Hi Ggoldfish,
Reading from what you posted, I guess you had tried so hard recently that you're both mentally and emotionally drained.
Trying to get your family's acceptance of your bf is fine, but do it on a pace that both sides can accept. Their acceptance might come after 1year, 3years, 6years, 10years or even 20years later. Noone knows this duration, as much as you wished that they will come to accept your decision next year but you need to come to terms that such thing doesn't happen overnight.
I guess you were so emotionally drained that you had that 'venting' post. Honestly speaking, reading that 'venting' post of yours, when you were mentioning your auntie offered to be your witness and had sort-of accepted your bf, your family accepting those stuff from your bf but not reciprocating, how you suspect your father to be faking illness etc etc complains and all.. To me, on the very surface, you seems very unhappy about your family. But deep under, its your immediate family members that really matters to you, otherwise all of that won't be bothering you so much and you won't be trying so hard.
You might want to take it easy and slowly from now onwards. Be at ease and natural. I don't think you need to specifically plan here and there, just be natural, as per other 'normal' couples and be strong to face rejecion. If its mid-autumn, just give them the mooncakes.. yes.. they might throw it away / place outside or whatever.. just be strong to face these rejections. Remember this, you cant control how your family want to think, do or feel about your bf. What you can control is what both of you can do.
About your father's illness, it might be fake / real, no one would be able to answer you on this. But I guess its really meaningless to go head on with him, with or without his illness. Do you know what I mean? So what if his illness is fake? It doesn't change abit about his opinion about your bf, does it? But it tells alot to him when his dear daughter suspect that he is actually faking his illness.
As you had already know when you decided on your guy, this is not going to be an easy path. Always bear in mind of these four ingredients. You might need alot of them to help brewing a nice pot of soup to share with your family:
a)patience
b)determination
c)be strong
d)lastly & most importantly, love (for your guy & family) to go through this long and tiring journey.
Wish you luck!