Duties of Ah Yees & Brothers on Wedding Day?

chrisy

New Member
dear orchid,
i would like to have a copy too...
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>> [email protected]
tks!
 


vivace

New Member
Hi Orchid,

Thanks for sharing the doc with us, it is very useful. After reading tat, I then realise that I overlook losts of details during the wedding day.

Thank you!
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musicgal

New Member
hi orchid,

after going thru ur list, only 1 phrase came to mind (hope u understand chinese): wu3 ling2 mi4 ji2!! thanks so much for sharing it! *really* appreciate it!
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C

ck&ym

Guest
Hi Orchid,

Are you Ah-Yees your friends or relatives? Me having problem deciding 'cos a little "political" on this matter. Also, do you have the same number of Ah-Yees and Xiong Di (for your groom)?

Can you also send me a copy of your file @ [email protected]

Thank you very much
 
A

amerline

Guest
Hi Orchid,

I am having problems selecting my ah-yees for my wedding too. Quite a sensitive issue.

Can you please send me a copy of your file at [email protected]

Thanks a million!! Appreciate all the guidance anyone can offer. : )
 

care

New Member
Hi Orchid,

SOrry for the trouble, but i had not received ur email. Could you kindly send it again, i really wish to have the bible.. ;)
My emaail add again : [email protected]
(there is an underscore after caren)

thanx a zillion
 

orchid

New Member
Hi amerline & ck&ym,

I had 7 ah yees. 1 was my sister, the rest were my very close friends. I had other girl cousins as well, but didn't consider them ah yees cos i didn't specifically invite them to be ah yee, and the bargaining was done mostly by my friends. The tip is to invite only very close friends.

My husband had 5 'xiong di'. 1 of them was his best man.

There's no rule that the number of ah yees and brothers must be the same as long as they're your close friends. Bear in mind that the more ah yees you have, the ang bao at the door needs to be bigger so that each ah yee gets at least $30. more ah yees also mean more sabo. hehe...
 

orchid

New Member
Hi to the rest,

Don't worry, I didn't forget you
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I was away for the weekend. Just sent it to you. Happy planning!

Bridetobe,

u didn't leave your email addr...
 
A

amerline

Guest
Hi Orchid,

Got the doc. Thanks! Really comprehensive, never thot of so many things in so detail b4, more panic now!

Can I clarify the sequence of events.

From my knowledge, the bride must go over PIL side for the tea ceremony 1st then change and come back to own mama side for tea ceremony right??? or can straight away serve tea so no need to back track.....

Pls advise...
 

orchid

New Member
Hi Amerline,

Traditionally,
1. Groom picks up Bride
2. Goes to Groom's parent's place for tea ceremony
3. Bride change then go back to Bride's parent's place for tea ceremony.

We didn't have time to go back & forth so we did the tea ceremony at my mom's place when my husband came and then went to my in-law's place then straight to church. Save us 1 trip, and save me 1 dress & 1 hair/makeup charge.
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Our parents weren't very particular on the sequence. You can check with your parents & in-laws.
 
A

amerline

Guest
sigh, my mum is super traditional, she still coming to terms abt me being a christian so i guess i can't save that trip.....

my solemnization is in the evening, so not that rushing *i hope*
 

shook

New Member
Hihi Orchard

How do your ah yi distribute the ang bao at the door?

Does bride need to give any bao to the ah yi, xiong di?

Does the bride's mum need to give any bao to the ah yi, xiong di?

My hubby's mum asked my hubby's nieces to come wif him to fetch me in the morning. Do we need to give them ang pow?
 

orchid

New Member
Hi shook,

the ah yees don't distribute the ang bao at the door! hahaa.... they normally distribute after the tea ceremony or even at the dinner. not done openly.

bride don't need to prepare ang bao for ah yees since they already get the ang bao at the gate. need to have ang bao for xiong di, but given by the groom.

normally bride's mom will give a token ang bao to ah yee & xiong di who are there for good luck. she can also prepare some for the nieces. no need big ang bao - $4 - $6 will do.

Hi Amerline,

Since solemnization is in the evening, you'll have lots of time! don't worry, can do with the extra trip.
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Actually the sequence of the trips have nothing to do with Christian or not. it's just how people want to show respect to the guy's side. and how traditional the parents are
 

vivace

New Member
Hi orchid,

thanks for your info, after reading the msg u reply to shook, now than i know tat the bride dont hv to give any bao to the ah yee, thought the bride also need to give them a big big ang bao.
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Beside ah yee and xiong di, do the bride need to give any ang bao? or in general, the groom will settle everything?
 

shook

New Member
Hihi Orchid

U mean bride's mum need only to give a small amt of token ang pow $4-$6 to ah yi n xiong di or the nieces?

Do both my hubby n me need to give any pow to the photographer (hired one) n make-up artist (fm bridal shop) or either one of us give ang pow will do? Roughly how much ang pow do we need to give?

Do we need to give any pow to the banquet manager n all the waiters n waitresses tho there is a 10% service charge?
 

orchid

New Member
Hi vivace,

Hubby need to give ang bao to the boy who opens the car door.

Need to give ang bao for your helpers - eg. dinner coordinator, receptionists, ushers etc. So if your Ah Yee is also your Dinner Receptionist, then she will get another ang bao for recep.
Don't need to give another ang bao to those not helping. Money for ang baos for helpers can be shared between u & hubby.

It's easier if you pass the ang baos & gifts for helpers to someone to distribute. You will be too frazzled on that day to do that. Ang bao for helpers can be given at the end of the wedding.

Hi Shook,

You & hubby don't need to give ang baos to hired photographer & make-up artist since you're paying. Normally they get token ang bao for good luck - given by bride's mother in the morning. U can prepare an ang bao of about $20 each for them in case your mom didn't give them anything.

Don't need to give anything to banquet manager & waiters. You've paid the hotel enough. I did send a thank you card to the banquet manager & operations manager after the wedding.
 

shook

New Member
Hihi Orchard

Oh need to give any pow to receptionist n usher even if they r ah yi n xiong di, I thot dun need. I wz receptionist n ah yi 4 for cousin. I only received open door ang pow + some small token fm my aunt I think coz my aunt took the ang pow $ then distribute to the ah yi. No ang pow being receptionist. Bsides my ex-colleague asked me to b her receptionist. She din give me ang pow. So I thot dun need to give ang pow for the helpers @ 9.
 

vivace

New Member
hi orchid and shook,

After reading your msg, now I realised tat whether to give ang bao or give to who is up to individual. giving out small token juz to show appreciation, make them happy, and I will b free from all these troubles, y not giving out more?
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orchid

New Member
Hi shook,

I gave all my receptionists & ushers because that is the additional help that they gave. Also to convey my appreciation for them.

Like vivace pointed out, it's a small token to show appreciation. If you have the budget, go ahead and give. If you're really tight on budget, then at least give a thank you card. It cost only a few cents but will definitely go a great deal in your friendship.
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