My ex fiance and I had a number of huge fights in the past few months and he broke up with me after one of them. We knew that we had communication issues and I knew i had temper issues, and realised that I didnt really understand him during the past few fights. I convinced him that i would learn to understand him better and proposed couple counselling to help fix our issues. We went for a few sessions but we havent identified and dealt with the root problems causing my frustrations and bad temper towards him. I tend to overthink and trying to find out the root problem really stressed me out, such that i lost my temper with him and hurt him very much again. Ever since, he's been adamant about moving on, not wanting to be hurt again, and we're not on talking terms. During this fight, I realised that it was always my lack of emotional control when i get frustrated, and it was my poor irrational handling of the situation which caused me to hurt him the past few times, one way or another. The source of the frustration did not matter. wanting to salvage our relationship, i approached our counsellor again for advice. I really love him, I'm really committed, and i'd do everything I can to not hurt him again, but it takes time and he might not have the patience. I wrote him a note to explain all these and proposed ways forward but I don't think it matters anymore. I'm in great pain after breaking up twice, especially after we had planned our wonderful future together, and knowing that i had realised my flaws too late which ruined the relationship we had forged. I'm really torn and I've never been so depressed before.