I knew her controlling nature during dating, I had also communicated to by then bf that i am not comfortable with her behaviour. Etc everytime we go out she will call him at 8pm+ asking where he is and wat time he going home. Then call again every hour asking the same and scold when he is not going back yet, fully aware we were out together. So he had to resort to telling lies to her that he is on the way home when we just were actually taking our dinner at 8pm, make sense? Sometimes he has to lie that he's working. Even when he has own activities w/o me, she will call and hurry him home as well. All his frens could predict its his mum on the line when his phone rings at night.
He assured me he will manage her over time and after we get married, she will not behave in this manner since married = grown up??? So in good faith i trusted him.
Then comes lots of unhappy indcidents while we started house hunting. She didnt allow her to move out, but when i finally agree to move in, she disallow me to renovate the house, only can paint the MBR, cant change furniture too. I was upset cos the house was under hb's sole name. She expect me to move in, and add my name to the house and take over the housing loan with hb while she keeps all the $ from proceeds of sale of their previous family flat.
I was too upset that i had wanted to call it over with him, but he begged and finally we bought a private unit and he wanted to move out. I did think abt how reltions with his mum before we were married and there had been times i confide with my close frens that i hope to cancel the planned wedding but everything is too late bcos the new hse was bought. They told me to hangin there and keep my fingers crossed MIL attitude will improve after wedding to be less controlling... so i did
During the time before the new hse was ready, i stayed at his place. MIL will give always interrogate abt our activities when hb informs her we're going out. Then she splash cold water to criticize etc. movie v nice meh? why go shop for new hse furniture again? jus buy from downstairs shop can liao... bla bla... ending with a black face and ghost chasing calls at night to hurry us back. She will intentionally stay up till we return home to check that wat time we come home and ensure hb didnt go stay at my mum's place with me.
I was disappointed that after marraige hb never educate her that she hv to change her controlling attitude as wat he promised. He jus pacify her by filling in all the info she wanted, despite i dislike other pple knowing our private activities outisde. When i trash things out with him, he finally told MIL nicely that it is not right for her to continue to behave in this manner. Then he gets a scolding from her that she is his mum, she has every right to know everything and he must obey all her commands, cannot listen to wife....
how will u handle?