Anyone knows of Hainanese marriage tradition?

blim

New Member
Jul, I regret not speaking more Hainanese when I was growing up... Now my command of the dialect is so poor. I recall being proficient in it till the government started the "Speak Mandarin" campaign lah. Haiz... Know what? My father is also a sailor! Hahahah.... Hainanese men either cooks or sailor..

Elaine, the biscuits your mum talks about is round or not? I'm sure your ILs will dote on you for having Hainanese blood. :D

Sweets, my wedding (both ROM and Customary) in end March 2004. Can you believe I haven't done my measurements for my gowns yet? Hehe... Really a procrastinator huh... I really Bo Bahd Di; Bo Gia Di...Mi Lo Bo Gia... Mi Lo Bo Bahd...
 


elaine77

New Member
Hi blim,

hahhaaa.. hey.. i understand the hainanese words that you type.. so funny.. bo bahd di..
lu Jia beo bo..

Im not sure issit round or square, must ask my mum about that. hmm... doting on me, im not very sure leh but i think she does not really dotes on DIL, maybe i havent really married into her family and i seldom goes to my hubby place, dun know if she really dotes on me.. hehee.. hopefully she does.

hey.. my maternal grandfather is a cook in the british army and served many high post officer before, he is really a good cook. I like his apple-pie very much and his 'yang rou tang', wahh.. best man,my ah-ehs did not pick up the skill from him but he pass away many yrs ago due to accident.. we were very sad as he is a very healthy man. My grandmother chicken-rice is the best..but she also did not pass down the recipe.. what a pity. My ah-boh (big auntie) husband is a sailor also a hainanese, my hubby paternal grandfather also a cook. I think it flows in the blood, my mum can cook very well also.. and im picking up from her.. hehee..i must learn as much from my mum so that i can capture my hubby 'wei' as he loves home-cooked food.
 

blim

New Member
heh... Elaine.. when I first call my big auntie Ah Boh, my FH almost fell off his chair. He said in Hokkien, the Boh sounds like wife or woman like that... He and my non-Hainanese friends were also laughing away when I teach them simple words. For eg, orange is "ga", apple is "ah bu", vegetable is "sai", rice is "bui", fighting is "pa geh". :D
 

jul

New Member
Elaine & blim

I also understand what you're typing! clipart{lol}

I forgot, my fiance's grandpa was a sailor too! I think it's really true. Whe they came to Nanyang from Hainan-Dao, they congregated & went into the same profession. Seems like Hainanese were all cooks / sailors / bread sellers
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Too bad my FMIL is Hokkien
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Think she doesn't know anything abt Hainanese culture. But I think she said something like Hainanese gals are all very big-sized. Cannot be right? *sob*
 

blim

New Member
huh? big-sized? means like gorilla like that is it? Not true lah... I am only 1.55M and 45kg leh... When I go to USA, I felt like a little pea. Sure wish I'm taller...
and slimmer...
and prettier...
and nicer complexion...
and silkier fuller hair...
whoa.. am I greedy or what...
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jul

New Member
Uh... that's what she said lah. I dunno, I'm quite big-sized. So she just anyhow base her assumptions I guess. I'm 1.62m at 56 kg, so quite big-sized lor.

*haha* U sure are greedy... Maybe Hainanese gals are supposed to be greedy too
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sindylee

New Member
Hi All,
I am also a Hainanese bride (Daddy Hainanese Mummy Teochew)... My FH is a Hokkien....
Although know how to speak a bit... but when i go Hainan duo... they don't understand...
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As for my wedding I believe will be a combination of Teochew + Hainan + Hokkien customs.... cause my parents and his parents both also don't know what need what don't need ... If hear say need this never get they feel weird weird... ;p

I am the only big size girl in the family...
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cause last time when I am young (and skinny) my grandma keep feeding me with so many tonic... now me so fat...
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don't know is bone structure or is fat, I need to lose 10 kg to get into acceptable weight...
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blim

New Member
10kg??? that's a lot leh...
but what is your height?
you attempting to lose 10kg by your customary?
when will that be?
in any case, I always think it is better to be heavier than to be shorter. If you're overweight, you can always target to lose weight. But if you're too short, there's nothing much you can do about it.. other than opting for that leg operation where they break up your bones to make it longer... Really hate to be wearing heels all the time.

Jul, you've got an ideal height for a Singaporean gal. Tall enough to look good in most clothes, short enough to match most singaporean guys.
 

jul

New Member
Sindy

Ur acceptable weight is the 'medical' one or the 'bride' one ah? Sorry to ask this, but just wu like to check
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jul

New Member
Blim

U're quite right. Gd thing I'm not taller, coz my fiance is abt 1.7+. But still, I'd like to have been 1.65m. Dunno why, I like round numbers lor
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alhana

New Member
Hi Jul,

I dunno abt the Hainanese girls being big sized. I was q big sized until I lost wt, and my aunts n cousins range from short n plump to short n skinny. Not many tall ones. Btw, we're pure hainanese
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My MIL told my hubby that Hainanese girls are v fierce. I think I can attest to that :p hehehe. Most of my female cousins are quite fierce too! But ok lah, doubt my hubby is scared of me :p

Hey, my maternal granddaddy was a cook too..for a British family. My dad said he made the best roast beef ever..said such a waste that all the daughters didn't learn how to cook from him :p But all my aunts are great cooks..so's my dad. In fact my dad is the resident cook in my house..mom's the guest cook. As for me...I don't cook at all coz I already have such great cooks in my home :p Plus I'm too lazy to learn.
 

sindylee

New Member
Hi All,
Actually I accepted my current weight... but then it is 10 KG more than the healthy weight... my customary is next year Dec.... but then ROM next month.....
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My FH is ok with my size... he said nicer to cuddle.... :p
 

sindylee

New Member
Hi All,

Height = 1.6 M
Weight = 71-2 KG

But then my FH same height as me so no heels...
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Got once suan by his uncle... he said next time fight will not fight lose to my FH....
 

jul

New Member
Hi alhana

Haha! My mum & her sisters are all quite short. Maternal grandad was short too. Maybe I'm abnormal coz my nutrition is much better than during their generation?

As for fierce, dunno leh. But my fiance dotes on me, so it's his fault that I'm a bit spoilt. Think maybe his mum is a bit jealous? *hee*

I can't cook either! Pure laziness... *blush*
 

jul

New Member
Hi Sindy

Forget abt those weird, insensitive pple. Actually sometimes some pple are naturally big-sized, but they are healthy. Just their bones are very heavy, & bone structure big-framed. But gd also, less risk of osteoporosis
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viavia

New Member
Just felt like chipping in. I'm a "nan-nang" too. And my grandfather used to be a cook for the british army. He makes the best pork chops and coffee!!
 

alhana

New Member
Hi girls,

Have u tried eating at this place called Shashlik at Far East? Its runned by these old Hainanese men and women and the food is really good! Love the bosch soup and the sashliks. Expensive tho!

Hi Sindy,

If it helps, my wt situation was almost similar to ures. In my case, most of the pple on my dad's side tend to be on the plump side. I'm also 1.6m tall, and weighed ard 65kg. But thru regular exercise and a change of diet, I managed to drop 15kg. It took me a year. I've managed to maintain my wt for the last 6 yrs coz I totally changed my lifestyle n stuck to it. If ure gunning to lose wt for ure customary, u still have lotsa time
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Don't try to lose too much in too short a time frame..it isn't good for ure body. My hubby was like u too! when young, he was really skinny..so they kept feeding him tonics and now he's quite big sized. Now his parents keep telling him he's fat! *roll eyes*
 

jul

New Member
Alhana

Which Far East? Shopping Centre / Plaza? Nvr heard of this place leh...

Wah. I love Hainanese pork chops *slurp*
 

alhana

New Member
Its in Far East Shopping Centre (next to Hilton)..tucked away in an obscure little corner on the 6th floor. I nvr knew abt until my ex-colleague brought me there one day. I later brought my hubby who loves the beef shashlik. A meal for 2 can cost ard $80 if u have soup, mains n a dessert. Its usually packed at nites n if u dun have reservations, u probably won't be able to find a seat if u come past 7pm.
 

sindylee

New Member
hi Jul,
actually it is ok cause I know that his uncle is joking... but then at least can fight fair with fh (well he dote me more than want to bully me) heheheeee

Hi alhana,
which part of your lifestyle did you change...
I got a few bad habits that I really have to change.... E.g. before Menses sure crave for chocolate.. ice cream.. cheese cakes... stress and work will turn to snacks like biscuits and chocolate (but then they help me think better)...
 

alhana

New Member
Hi Sindy,

Its the initial changes that were the worst. I cut down on carbs like rice, pasta, breads etc You can still eat them, but in smaller portions. I stopped eating some of my fave stuff like peanut butter (sniff...that was tough), butter, junk food (eg chips), fried foods (no more char kuey teow, KFC, fries etc), oily or fatty foods (like chicken skin, certain meats). I ate more veg, more fruits, tofu n my carbs became brown rice instead of white, wholemeal bread instead of white bread..more fish, grilled meats (minus fatty parts)...think u get the drift.

But changing ure diet is not enough. You still have to exercise to burn excess fat and tone your body. So I went swimming, did aerobics, did some wt training, cycling..and I did it almost every day.

Actually, once u get into the groove of things, you'll start to get used to it and can even enjoy it. NOw I dun really crave for fried or oily foods anymore..in fact I dun think I can stomach them. I still enjoy the occasional treats like cakes, brownies, ice cream, chocs (which woman doesn't like them!) but always in moderation. And I can't live w/o eating veg. Right now my hubby is following in my foot steps and he's already lost a few kilos. Its tough, but it gives results. Changing ure lifestyle and sticking to it will help you maintain the wt too. However if ure just looking to lose wt for a short period of time (eg wedding), chances are u'll balloon up again once the wedding is over. So its the idea of changing ure lifestyle tt will help you, not having short term aims like losing wt for a certain occasion. Best of luck! It'll take lotsa determination!
 

sindylee

New Member
Hi alhana,
Thanks for the advice... Well my fh is now training for his IPPT, so we sort of try to go to the gym on alternate days... I also notice that after start going to gym... Hopefully able to cut down... (my sisters snacks on chips, chocolate and cookies, but they like eat waste rice one... never put on weight... how i envy them.. ;P)

I also learn that if I force myself not to take certain food... once the craving start.. I end up eating double... so now and then will pamper myself... Is this alright??? Or will still be back to square one???
 

jul

New Member
Hi alhana

Not cheap! But if the food is gd, why not? I'm a bit tired of Jack's Place etc when I go out for 'expensive' dinners!
 

jul

New Member
I cannot give up on my food! Ice cream, chocolates, cookies! Think I'll die leh... and dun think I can go exercise every single day.

I want to be at abt 50kg, but how to lose 7 kg? sounds like mission impossible *sob*
 

olive

New Member
hi everyone! can i join in too cos i'm half hainanese (mum's side) n teochew (dad)? but i speak hainanese like some elderly hainanese lady
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that's cos i grew up wif my maternal granparents.

like most of u, i'm proud of my hainanese heritage. hey, any of u can speak hainanese or not, besides transparent??? ;)

dunno much hainanese customs tho my wedding is in 3wks time!!

jul, i can understand yr 'plight' cos i'm in the same position.... i LOVE my chocs, cakes, cookies, ice-cream n etc... too much too!!! since being in oz, i put on like 5-6 kg n it's not like i'm so skinny or light to start with!!

i'm hoping to lose at least 3-4kg if possible within these 3wks but then again, it also sounds like mission impossible

hahaaha..... u r rite... hainanese pple arent known for their height. most of my family members are pretty short.

but 1 thing that hainanese is good for is their great cooking n food!! also, they are very closely knitted family/clan.

so wat say u all? do u think so?
 

blim

New Member
heh you're right Olive...
I think Hainanese warm up with each other more than other dialects. We're "Nan Nang"!
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But I also sense that not many people think highly of Hainanese leh.. Wonder why... any of you got that feeling? I'm definitely very proud to be a Hainanese.
For me, I lose weight by drinking lots of lots of water till stomach full full. But that's only good for losing a couple of kgs for special occasion and not lasting. How to resist chocolates and ice-cream???

Actually, if your partner is big-framed, should still look ok together right? Can have some leeway to be a bit bui bui. No worries...
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alhana

New Member
Hi Jul,

I actually don't like Jack's PLace. I feel the food isn't very nice, and its not very cheap at that. I wld rather pay abit more and have a really good meal.

Haha..I can't resist the occasional chocolate or ice-cream too. Actually you can't totally deprive ureself of such indulgence..coz u'll end up craving for it more, and more likely than not, ure craving will win out against ure determination to lose wt. So Sindy, its perfectly fine to pamper ureself once in awhile..just don't over do it. One of the worst things is snacking in front of the tv (which I'm still guilty of at times) and eating late nite suppers (very very bad!) What's more, hainanese are such good cooks...its hard to diet when ure surrounded by yummy food! Actually now that my weight has more or less stabilised, I'm less fussy abt my food. I still make sure I eat healthy, but once a wk I give myself a treat by eating 'bad' food. And I compensate by exercising regularly to maintain my wt.

Hi Olive & blim

I don't spk the dialect but I understand it. Nvr really had a chance to spk it coz my parents spk to me and my sis in English & Mandarin. As for my cousins, we usually converse in English. Such a pity tho...

I'm proud to be a hainanese too. I don't sense that others think less of us leh..unless I'm v thick skin or don't care :p But I think its true that we warm up to one another quickly...its like some affinity for one another. I still remember when we used to patronise this western stall in a hawker centre. It was runned by a hainanese. My dad found out one day and started talking to him in hainanese. After that, he kept giving us extra stuff, like more fries, more meat etc..heheheh.
 

jul

New Member
Hi Olive

It's great that u can still speak Hainanese. Just nvr lose it, or u'll regret like me
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Thr prob is Haninanese are too good cooks! How to get tirm when delicious steaming food is placed in front of u all the time. When u find a way to trim off the kgs, let me know too! I'm getting desperate thinking of a gd idea to slim down & not give up on my food & not exercise! *dream on*
 

jul

New Member
Hi blim

Maybe Hananese are minority gp, so we tend to stick together more when we find a tong xiang?
 

jul

New Member
Alhana

I think the food at Jack's Place used to be much better. But I'm losing the taste for it these days too. Hard to find a restaurant that serves relatively cheaper food, not as noisy as food court, etc etc.

But I can't help snacking. U can find me munching away at biscuits after lunch! But how do u control the type of food u eat? Do u have to eat at home very often, coz it's hard to tell hawkers not to add too much oil, take out the fast etc right?
 

alhana

New Member
Hi jul,

Wah, if there's an easy way to lose wt w/o having to give up food and w/o exercising, the world will not have any fat or obese pple :p Yeah..dream on...hehehe.

We do eat hawker food at times. I usually opt for healthier stuff like fish soup or yong tau foo. Sometimes I'll just give in and eat something bad like mee goreng, western etc..but I make it a habit not to eat it too often. When I do, I'll ask the hawker for more veg, less carbs (like less mee and more veg) I will usually pack lunch to work. Used to pack sandwiches but now I've shifted to chef salads. Tasty, healthy, cheap n easy to prepare. Easier on the pocket then eating out every lunch time too. Biscuits can be very bad..high in sugar n butter n partially hydrogenated fats. Try to snack on healthier stuff like apples, oranges or other crunchy fruits. even nuts can be good, if u eat the raw unsalted ones. And remember to drink lotsa water (avoid sweet canned drinks) coz it'll make u feel more full n water's good for the body n skin. Once u get used to it, it'll become easy. Its the starting out that's the most difficult hurdle to cross
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jul

New Member
Thanks, alhana. Guess we all know what's gd for us, but it's just difficult to put into practice right?

Gog to get water now *haha*
 

olive

New Member
since there's this hainanese clan for the older generation, maybe we shld have a younger, funkier hainanese clannies....heeheee ;-) where we not only increased awareness of the hainanese cultures, but organise trips to hainan island for the young adults, hainanese food fair, do voluntary work, act as interpreter for the old hainanese folks in nursing homes or something like that lah!

well, just a idealistic dream huh?
 

sindylee

New Member
Hi Olive,
Well I personally been to Hainan island.. the Place is good for tour if you like scenery.... but then if your relatives is there... you will be boomard with request for $$$.....
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ralphine

New Member
HI all,
When I started reading the posting from you girls, I cant stop myself from laughing. Its really funny! I'm a cantonese and my hubby is a hainanese, when u girls were saying that Hainanese men are good lookings, I must agree, coz my hubby is not bad looking!
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However, I cant speak Hainanese coz my hubby doesnt speak that to his parents. So I guess the tradition is losing its way slowly. My actual day will be in Sept'04, I have no idea what will the wedding tradition be.. Maybe you girls can tell me more... I have no idea what my cantonese tradition is going to be either.. CHAM ah!
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*help*
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blim

New Member
alamak... my bridal designer said I have to wear 4-inch heels cos I much shorter than my FH. Never worn such high heels before.. wear already dunno will appear like stilt-walker or not hor?
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Ralphine,
My actual day is in March-04. I'll let you know after I've gone through the ceremony ok?
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jul

New Member
Hi Olive

Not a bad idea. But then, it really takes very dedicated & passionate pple to carry this thru. Besides, where wud we get funding? Community Chest? *wink*
 

jul

New Member
Hey Sindy

I heard that they always ask for money too. Sort of takes the joy out of visiting ur gu xiang right? But I think in China, u see pple asking for money everywhere, not just in Hainan Dao.
 

blim

New Member
My father going back Hainan Dao in December.
Haiz... means must pay a bomb to those relatives again...

Did anyone read about the closure of a Hainanese eatery at Park Mall? Such a pity huh...
 

sindylee

New Member
Hi Jul,
maybe it is true loh.... But then got one incident that someone got breast cancer... ask us to send money to them cause they just bought a van / truck so no money to see doc.... My dad reply no money ask them to go sell the van / truck...

my Granduncle in hainan dao.. he say want to come for my wedding... daddy said of course he want to come... cause he will go back with more $$ that he spent on the air tickets...

Later he collect more hong bao than me how??? me need to cover the wedding expenses one leh.... :p
 

jul

New Member
I guess they've been cooped up too long in China. Communist & everything. So all of them come across as very $ hungry.

Yeah lor, shd just sell the van for money. But a similar incident happended to my fren b4. Except the relative is Malaysian, not China.

Yeah, think he'll prob not return the ang paos into the box right?
 

ralphine

New Member
soupie!
I know u for so long and never know that u are 100% pure hainanese! HAHAH! Fred is 1/2 hainanese, thats make me '1/2' too
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Maybe u can help me to get some infor for my GDL later!
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soupie

New Member
ralphine, hahaha hope i can help.. but think my mum also dunno anything leh.. hehe i only know u have the 'yi bua' during all big occasions whether it's wedding, baby's 1st month or even just birthdays... it's the same as teochew's ang ku kueh... but it's white in colour and contains coconut, tangerine and ginger. that's ALL i know.. hahahaha :p
 

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