Anyone can help me?


New Member
Anyone can help me?

Me and my hubby do not have any sex for almost one year as he has problem in having erected. He did not have time to have dinner with us as he said that he was too busy with his business. Slowly, our relationship become sour.

Some times ago, I saw mushy sms on my hubby's hp. I confronted him and he said that those sms were not his and were belong to his friend as he lent his hp to him. My hubby has a few hps.

When I asked for more details, he just said that his friend is having an affair and it is none of our business and why so concern about other people's things.

One day, I happened to see hotel reservation on a Penang's Hotel on his email. And it happened that he was away to his hometown in Malaysia during that period. I confronted him again and he said that he was helping his friend to book.

I am puzzle why he did not bother to explain to me when I already suspicious about him.

After all the incidences, I felt insecure and paranoid. I know that it is not right to look into his things but I just cannot control my behaviour. I always end up confronting him over and over again when I found some suspicious things. I keep on asking him whether is he having an affair but he said no.

I am really lost...


New Member
Getting paranoid doesn't serve any purpose other than scaring yourself and leading you to make assumptions which could strain your relationship further.

Sit down and have heart-to-heart talk with him. As for his problem, get him to see a doctor. He could be stressed out by work or other issues.


New Member
i guess u & ur hubby should have a good tok.. instead of guessing tings.. wat ur hubby said may be true or may not be true.. so communication will be the best key to sort tings out.. n be calm too..


New Member
I have tried to communicate with him. He just keep telling me it is none of our business and why so concern about it. I was just wondering why he did not want to tell me more if he is not the one having an affair and let me keep on guessing.


New Member
it depends on how well you know your husband or rather what kind of person you believe he is, hence leading to how much trust you are willing to place in him and what he says. there are many ways if you want to find out the truth - hire PI, check with his friend etc. But if turns out that your husband is speaking the truth, then your actions will cause another spate of disagreement between you and your husband.
Or you can wait until you chance upon concrete evidence.
Or you can sit down with him and discuss.
But i don't know how's your relationship with your husband - whether he's those that's willing to open up to you - judging from what you have written he seems pretty evasive.
Ultimately the choice is yours. but whatever you choose to do, consider the consequences that comes with it. Say if your husband is really having an affair - how will you deal with that?


New Member
hi Lost.. is ur hubby usual way of not discussin stuffs on his colleague?? coz u should have understand ur hubby for quite sometime.. if he is those who dun interfer wat his colleages do, i guess there is nthin fishy about tt.. n ofc for gals.. we will tend to wan to knw more stuffs even though its not realli our business.. guess u should just be normal.. unless u can find other convincing evidence to prove tt wat he said r not true..


New Member
Hi Lost_babe,

Possible to keep your cool and monitor situation? Try to "collect evidence" first rather than confrontation. Since your hubby already denied having affairs. More confrontation would lead to more unhappiness and may worsen your marriage...

Also, it may really be a misunderstanding.....


Active Member
before you probe further, you may want to decide on what you will do or want if he indeed is having an affair.

Unfortunately the signs that he was showing - classic example of someone in an affair. And they will get really angry if you probe further.

In the meantime be cool and observe. Don't ask him about his friends affairs anymore.

Is he having problem with erection in the past? Or was his behaviour now the same as before or has he changed?

You should be the best person to know all these


New Member
Agreed wif sm..

Quite high chance he is having an affairs.

He will be very careful after all the checking on his sms and email. The best solution is to get a PI.


New Member
i guess u should remain cool.. n plan wat r u gg to do..there will onli be 2 ans in e end.. its either wat he said is true or he is realli having an affair.. tink ahead of wat u r or will gg to do in tis situation.. n like wat sm had said.. no point wasting $$ & time on Pl..coz e important part is wat u r gg to do in tis situation


New Member
Dont waste time thinking when there is still no truth.. You wont be able to get the true ans if he continue say no and becoz of his fren.

When the truth is out, then u start to think what u gg to do next. One step at a time.


New Member
Actually i found man who is having an affair outside will be very careful on every single things they are doing and not let wife find out. They will tend to delete mushy sms & hotel bookings etc..
Lost babe,

Hiring a PI is not gonna be cheap and the PI report is only valid for 6 mths if you are going to use it as evidence. Of course whether the PI is able to get evidence of adultery admissible by court is another issue as it really depends on the quality of the PI.

Why dun you think about what you would do if he is indeed having an affair? If you are definitely going on the divorce route if he is found to be having an affair, then go ahead and get a PI. If you only want the truth and may not want a divorce at the end of it, go for a PI if you don't mind parting with the money. It could run up to $10k depending on how complex it is.


New Member
I just wonder can a wife after seeing mushy sms and the reservation of hotel, will not suspicious of hubby having affairs. Can the wife just remain normal like nothing happens? Does it mean that the wife does not trust her hubby?

When I told my hubby my feelings, he just said that he is not having an affair and asked why I keep on looking his hp. He said if he really having an affair, he will not give any chance for me to see the mushy sms and the reservation of hotel.

Yes, I admit that I only saw those mushy sms three times for the past 1 year. If he really having an affair, the sms should be everyday, right? Or is it that he forget to delete?

I really hate of my paranoid behaviour now. How do I know the truth without hiring Private Investigator? I really don't want to hire as I consider that is the last resort. I just want to know the truth without hurting him as what if what he said is true and he found out. Can anyone help me?


New Member
Coden; you seems to forgot that there are also plenty of careless idiots out there who don't wipe their mouths clean after they eaten outside...


Active Member
lost babe,

You haven't answer the question of what are you going to do if confronted with the truth?

I guess you are lost now and you don't even know what to do.

The best is to keep calm, don't probe and observe his behaviour, outings, etc etc.. is it different from the past?

If he is having affairs, the truth will be out sooner or later. If he is not having, you worry too much also no use.

It is not easy to pretend to be normal but you have to - otherwise you would go crazy pretty soon or depress and drive him further away from you.


New Member
Lost babe, frankly, i think what you want is not the truth. what you want, is the assurance that your husband is NOT having an affair.
As mentioned, if you've gotten the truth, and the truth is that your husband is indeed having an affair - how are you going to cope with that? Or can you pretend that nothing has happened even after knowing that your husband is having an affair?
If you so badly want to know the truth, hire a PI. You will get what you ask for. If that answers your question?


New Member
i guess u must be prepared tt if ur hubby is having affair outside.. he will be extra careful not to leave any traces behind.. n since u have confront him about tis issue b4, he will do anyting to prevent u finding out(mentally prepared if u ever hire Pl)


New Member
Hi Lost_Babe,

I have similar experience too....saw mushy sms like "I love you", "I love you too" and "I know it's not fair to you now....".

The first reaction is definitely shocked and I confronted my hubby and of course he denied. What else would he says. Kept repeating that it's just fun real meaning and I was accused of being paranoid and not trusting him based on sms!

So what I did was to secretly monitor his phone calls and sms. Sometimes I do get the evidence but sometimes, can't loh.....

Also, I had reflected his behaviour in the past mths/year to see if I can find any symptom of him having affair....

anyway, the main point is, keep cool. Since he has already denied so many times, by continuing to confront him would not give you any answers.

Live life as per normal so that it's easier for you to "catch" any evidence and by keeping cool, he'll think you are not suspicious of him anymore and hence, he would let off his guard.

If it's a misundrestanding, at least your relationship would not worsen....if it's really an affair, you would be able to use the evidence to confront him....

Just my experience and decide


New Member
Most man will nt admit he is having affair when confronted. I find that it is useless to keep thinking what u shld do if he is having affair... to prepare yourself? Please la, when u know the truth then plan abt it isnt that better? What if the truth is positive, then u r wasting your time thinking and having sleepless nites planning wat to do.. It is like nt yet strike a TOTO and keep thinking what to do with the $10 mil. hahaha..


New Member
It's true that man would not admit even if he is caught in bed with another gal.

To prepare for the worst, we need to gather "evidence" so that it can used in the event a divorce is seeked and the man turned nasty. It's a way to protect ourselves.

If it's true, we can "strike" the unfaithful man by throwing all evidence against him and go straight to divorce. If the man is remorseful, he will turn back.... In order to do that, planning and preparation is a must.


New Member
I think no one can help you much in such a situation. You know all the general advice, Observe, check for unusual evidence, talk to him, etc etc. The more daring ones will perhaps say, Confront him aggressively. But I'm sure you are mature enough to have explored all these various options.

It's hard for anyone to say much since everyone here are mere names without faces, and will not know exactly you and your hubby's characters and present situation.

Unfortunately, heart-to-heart talk or communication is the way to go in sorting out tiffs between couples. Since he says, It's none of your business, that's a strong sign the relationship is not healthy. If a spouse is not willing to discuss things openly, who can?

Marriage is such a headache huh. Before marriage, couples whisper all the oh-so-sweet "I love yous", share their thoughts and passions together (and some even physical bodies), spend elaborate time and money planning and going thru the wedding ceremony.

Then after that it's "I'm not interested in sex anymore", "I'm busy with work so I'm spending less time with you" or like your case, "It's none of your business".

(Reminds me of my single friends who gave 1001 reasons why not to get married.)

It takes effort to keep a marriage going. Honesty between spouses is one of the first few steps.

As far as having extra-marital affairs are concerned, it's not only the men who will not admit. The women involved in it are equally guilty.

It takes both hands to clap. Some like to blame it on the men, but I find the women are no less to be blamed, given that most of the time, they already know the guys are married, and some are with kids.

I don't know why these married people do this. Maybe it's stress or 21st century way of living.


New Member
He said was "None of our business" and not "none of your business"... Which sentence is more serious? Or is it the same meaning? I also don't know...


New Member
Hi Habe,

Yes, I admit that I just want to assure that my hubby is not having an affair as I still cannot believe my hubby is that type of person and he is the one who likes to help friends. However, after seeing so many fishy incidences, I just cannot help it. I think this is typical woman's doing...


New Member
hi lost babe,

me too cannot believe that my hb is that type of person who will have an affair...but it happened...and we have to learn to accept it...

you have to be mentally prepared as chances is rather high based on what you have mentioned. you should know best about the way he behaves when you questioned him (he'll avoid eye contact)they will not admit that they are having an affair until the truth is out... mine was in denial state and his temper will flare whenever I probe further.

hang on there,I guess he will admit when he cannot live in guilt any longer just like mine. patience if you wants to keep the marriage's always easier to say but give it a try. I've been through the same situation and I know how you feels at this moment.
lost babe...
sometimes... its abt communication and trust...
if ur hubby is not open to talking... then there is nothing much you can do...
how long are u both married? any kids?


New Member
hi babe,

perhaps you think too much, maybe he's telling the truth. why be bothered over minor stuff like the 3 and only mushy sms which you have seen in a year? maybe he did not bother to explain to u because he feel that its not an issue at all because he did not do any things behind yr wat u say, he is the type who like to help friends, it could be just his friends' matter.
Lost babe,

I guess in order for you to ascertain if you hb is having an affair, and since hiring of PI is a last resort for you, you just have to monitor his actions/behaviours to detect any abnormalies.

You need a really strong heart when you are conducting your "investigation work". At the same time, keep cool and you must refrain from probing him. Just observe him and you would be able to ascertain if he is innocent or guilty over time. Please take care yah?


New Member
Just to share a touching story from another forum.. Lost babe, u may want to sent it to ur hubby's email..

" On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms. The bridal car stopped
in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then
plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.

This was the scene of ten years ago.

The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid,
I went into business and tried to make more money. When the assets were steadily increasing, the affections between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.

Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was
more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.

Dew came into my life.

It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from
behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was the apartment I bought for her.

Dew said, You are the kind of man who best draws girls eyeballs. Her
words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we just married, my wife
said, Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my
wife. But I couldn t help doing so.

I moved Dew s hands aside and said, You go to select some furniture,
O.K.? I ve got something to do in the company. Obviously she was
unhappy, because I had promised her to go and see with her. At the
moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used
to be something impossible to me.

However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter
how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt. Honestly,
she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner. I was
sitting together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's
body. This was the means of my entertainment.

One day I said to her in a slight joking way, suppose we divorce, what
will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word.
Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from
her. I couldn t imagine how she would react once she got to know I was

When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the
staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide
something while talking with her. She seemed to have got some hint. She
gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.

Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live
together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.

When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I ve got something
to tell you, I said.

She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know
what I was thinking. I want to divorce. I raised a serious topic calmly.

She didn t seem to be much annoyed by my words, instead she asked me
softly, why? . I m serious. I avoided her question. This so-called
answer turned her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!

At that night, we didn t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she
wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly
give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated
that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She
glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain in my heart.
The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger
one day. But I could not take back what I had said.

Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected
to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of
divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and

A late night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her
writing something at the table. I fell asleep fast. When I woke up, I
found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.

She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn t want anything from me,
but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in
the month s time we must live as normal life as possible. Her reason was
simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she
didn t want him to see our marriage was broken.

She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day?
This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me.
I nodded and said, I remember . You carried me in your arms , she
continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your
arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.

I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished
to end her marriage with a romantic form.

I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face
the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made
me feel uncomfortable.

My wife and I hadn t had any body contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out for the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son
clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don t tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for bus, I drove to office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse.
I realized that I hadn t looked at this intimate woman carefully for a
long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine
wrinkles on her face.

On the third day, she whispered to me, The outside garden is being
demolished. Be careful when you pass there.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were
still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The
visualization of Dew became vaguer.

On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as,
where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc.
I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger.

I didn t tell Dew about this.

I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me
stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now.

She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried
quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, All my
dresses have grown fatter. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was
because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because
I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart.
Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to
touch her head.

Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it s time to carry mum out. He said.
To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential
part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him
tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at
the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom,
through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck
softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our
wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.

On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step.
Our son had gone to school. She said, Actually I hope you will hold me
in your arms until we are old.

I held her tightly and said, Both you and I didn t notice that our life
was lack of such intimacy.

I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid
any delay would make me change my decision. I walked upstairs. Dew
opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won t divorce. I m

She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no
fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can
only say sorry to you, I won t divorce. My marriage life was boring
probably because she and I didn t value the details of life, not because
we didn t love each other any more. Now I understand that since I
carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to
hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed
the door and burst into cry. I walked downstairs and drove to the

When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my
wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me to write the
greeting words on the card. I smiled and wrote, I ll carry you out every
morning until we are old. "


New Member
Me and my hubby already 30+. We married for 6 years and we have 2 kids. The youngest one is 1 year old.

Yesterday, I talked to my hubby again. My hubby said why bother about people's things and why bother since it is not concern us. And he finally said why bother to explain the same old thing to me. He said I am the one who think too much and I am the one who cannot get out of that circle.

Actually, when I saw the first sms, my hubby explained to me that his friend's hubby was having an affair and after that his friend met a guy and she was having an affair with that guy. She asked my hubby to borrow his extra hp to her so that her hubby will not discover. I also know his friend and she also called me up and explain to me.

Then, when I saw the second sms after a few months, I confronted my hubby again as it is different hp no from the 1st one. My hubby did not bother to explain to me.

From that onwards, I became paranoid and will quarrel with him over small things, like when he has no time having a dinner with me, when he do not hold hands with me, when he do not talk to me etc, with my thinking that he is no longer loving me.

Now, I just puzzled why he did not bother to explain to me since he is not the one who is having an affair and if it is true that those sms belong to the same person.

Yesterday, when I asked him what if he is the one who saw the mushy sms on my hp, will he get suspicous. He just said that he will not see my hp, like me...


New Member

keep your cool.....seems like confronting doesn't work and may worsen your relationship. Just monitor the situation and even if you can't help being paranoid, do not show in front of him.

I'm giving you my views b'cos I'm doing the same. I do not want to have my effort to go to waste if the situation is not as bad as I think. I'm trying to salvate my marriage since my hubby wanted to.


Active Member
Sad Gal

I must say your trying to soothe the feelings of Lost Babe has come across as ironic. I don't doubt your sincerity but where is your credibility since you are seeing a married man yourself. If I were you, I would just keep quiet.


New Member
Hi babe,

sorry if i'm coming across has a little harsh. Definitely every women would of cos want an assurance that the husband is faithful, but now problem is how do you want to pursue this reassurance? if you husband is not talking, and hiring PI may seem drastic as this juncture, i guess the only way is to lie low and wait until you are able to get more concrete evidence.
However, correct me if i'm wrong, you don't feel good to sit around and wait as well?
My suggestion would be that you calm down and clear your thoughts and feelings on this first before deciding what you want to do next, sometimes listen to your instinct - how much do you or are you willing to trust this man?


New Member
My instinct? Now I also cannot trust my instinct anymore as I have became paranoid now. I don't know whether am I suffering from Post-Natal depression as all these incidences started after I gave birth 1 year ago. Of course I am not up to such a extreme that wanting for a commit sucide or what. I am just becoming more paranoid, easily get angry with small things...


New Member
I think part of your frustration could be arising due to the fact that you are not sure what you want to do. You want to know that your husband is faithful but yet cannot be sure due to the few "fishy incidents". But yet you don't really dare to take further steps (other than trying to get your husband to talk but he won't, that's adding to your frustration as well) because you are probably fearful of what you might come to know?

I'm no expert but i think the likelihood of post natal is low since its been a year. Luckily you are aware that suicide is not an option!
But if you do suspect some form of depression, then seek professional help/counselling.


New Member

I think everyone has the right to make any comments or giving advice to anyone who need helps here, no matter wat is her background or status.. In this case, u shldnt doubt sad_gal's sincerity and credibilty. If everyone has the same mentality as u, then divorcee shld nt be giving any comment or advice to those who plan to married..and there is nvr ending to that.

Sad gal
U read it is nt only the 3 mushy sms as u mentioned.. He has no time for her and they even have no sex for one year.. How can a wife nt worry?? If is u, will u?


Active Member
RS, please convince me on the point of preaching one thing and doing another thing. Where is her credibility being a third party telling another woman not to suspect her husband over some questionable SMSes? If you don't find it ironic, that's just you. I find it super ironic. And, is it so difficult for her to just keep quiet on this?

Many divorcees still believe in marriage or relationship even if their own marriage did not work. After divorce, many have gone into relationship or even a second marriage. Hey, we don't go around telling people to divorce or stop marrying.


New Member

Then a 3rd party, who based on her experience, can also give good advice to those who has the same problem.. y not? Of coz i agreed divorcees definitely can give good advices abt marriage.. did i say no? i am just quoting u an carefully.

Her comments might nt be good thats y i highlighted 2 points to her.. u read it?


New Member
hahaha...yes, I agree with DOll...

Felt a bit weird to see sad_gal in here trying to console a wife about her so-call straying husband...

In another thread, I just told her to leave that married man and she kept saying difficult lah....not easy lah....etc

hahaha...irony...I would say.


Active Member
RS, you didn't answer my question nor did you manage to convince me on how anyone can stomach the words of a person who preaches one thing and does something else.

If she wants to be a third party, no one can stop her. But at least be a wiser third party lah. No one will fault her for keeping quiet on this topic.


New Member

Don't think sad_gal would have any answer to your question lah....she needs to settle her own problem in the other thread 1st ;P


Active Member
If she manages to get herself out of shit I am sure she will be able to help others in the boat that she used to be trapped in. But if she is trapped on a burning boat herself, how is she going to save others in their own burning boats?


Active Member
RS, sorry to tell the truth that your example sucks as an example to prove your point; not because I didn't read carefully.


New Member
lost_babe, my husb also did once similar thing like that..but in this case, i know that his frens are the one having affair...the frens both married, but they affair, and use my husb as middle man. i was paranoid & skeptical.... but when i finally got chance to meet those married-affair ppl, i trust my husb (ABIT ONLY)....

but then again, i find those affairs only make him bold in his perception? in "it is OK...ppl are doing it anyway"

and yes, the excuse they say when we check their always same~ that he dont check my hp, why must i CHECK his.... (i told him straight coz i dun hide/delete anything lo...he can jolly well scan my HP i dun mind at all, so why should he mind if i scan his?)

in a way, i see myself in lost_babe... and still the same reflection.


New Member

If i still can recall her story, it is that guy who lied to her initially.. and is nt what she wanted to be wif a married man. She has put all her feeling and hopes on him and then came the truth.. Not everyone can let go her emotion and feeling just overnite.. it take times and determination. It is nt surprise she is still attached to him now but i believe the feeling will get faded one day becoz she need time to let go her feeling for him. I know u r a very straight forward person.. any of ur guys lie to u or having a 3rd party, u will break off wif them immediately.. this is ur character, very good keep it up. But nt every women r like u.. they need times. Y there r still so many wives choose to stay wif her hubbies despite they having affairs? There must be a gd reason behind that right?


New Member

My example and intention is to tell u nt to look down on ppl.. be her is a 3rd party, ktv ger, whore..etc But if u choose to, then i hv no further comments. Cheers!!


Active Member
RS, I am not what I am overnight too. When I chose to give up on the straying ex-bf, I struggled too emotionally, but that did not stop me from making a logical decision. So, all the more I knew the short-term pain that I had to endure to experience long-term happiness. I am not expecting Sad Gal or anyone to change overnight. What we have been discussing is food for their thoughts.

I am sorry that you feel I look down on third parties. The truth is, I don't, even if I had spoken harshly.