Advice needed


New Member
Hello friends i am seeking advise here before the wedding there are things that we both family have to sort out for example i am from a teochew family and my fiancee is from a hakka family. My family requires me to follow the male teochew tradition style where as after gate crashing i bring the bride home for a tea ceremony with my parents and relatives followed on by going back to the brides house for the tea ceremony there but my future in laws demanded me to give them the first tea instead and not to my own parents. I understand that there are different traditions to a wedding so we have to give and take a step back. So we decided to give the first tea to her parents then proceed back to give my parents but during the process of this negotiation i feel that i have been insulted badly by my future in laws (e.g if u cannot fulfill what we demand then dont marry my daughter, u marry into my family instead and leave my parents) because of this issue i fought with my parents to take a step back and allow them to have the first tea. I feel very bad towards my parents as i failed to follow my tradition and my fiancee even cried when negotiating with her parents and they even scolded her by saying she is unfilial as she is siding with me. Do you think my in laws are too much? I believe there are more things that my future in laws will demand before the wedding how do i overcome them and not disrespect them at the same time as i believe that a wedding is supposed to be a happy ceremony please help.