Adoption

[childless35]

I am 35, married for 6 years, and no kids.

I would love to experience pregnancy and motherhood, and I love to have my own kid.

Unfortunately, hubby is not agreeable on having children at all. I didn't know this before we got married and if I knew, I won't marry him at all.

6 years ago I contempleted divorce because he refuse to have children. On and off i mention this to him again, and each time he said no.

Anyway, to cut the story short, he has now agreed to adoption.

Is there anyone out there who has considered or used this option? I am quite torn on this decision.

 

[pantieileen]

Oh i'm considering whether or not i have my own kids, we'll adopt 1 from Thailand. After checking, realised that husband and wife must be staying together in the same country then eligible so can't adopt now.

It's a good choice to adopt, giving someone a chance of a better life so why not?

 

[childless35]

My concerns on adoption are:

1) I will not love the child, because the child's not biologically mine. This is also my biggest fear.

2) What if the child has some hereditary chronic disease that surfaced later in life? I will not be able to accept it, because he/she is not mine.

3) I will not bond with child as he/she will not have my features, my traits. I feel no affinity at all.

4) Since the biological parents are giving up the child for adoption, they may not have taken care during pregnancy and the foetus might not be as healthy, and might grow up to be a moody child?

I wanted a child of my own very badly, and the next closest thing that I can have is an adopted child. I am now trying to see if it will work for me.

I know my concerns are prejudiced, but I can't help myself. It's really a struggle.

 

[carlislesg]

For me, if thats the case then Adoption is the best option cause we can feel so lucky to have them as a parents and somehow they will also feel the same way too..

 

[esteelim]

Am adopted child myself. I turned out quite well tho my mum didn't eat well then & father used to kick her when she was carrying me.

Now happily married. I thank God for this man I married past 40s and had a son. We love him so much, now thinking of adopting for son's companionship. We believe in miracles and Love that was given freely to us, and want to share our lives with one more child.

Anyone knows the process of adopting a Vietnamese child? Any pitfalls to avoid?