A Place To Vent Anger on Monster In Laws

[flowerygal]

Jus found out recently tat my 2nd BIL is asking my hus 2 help him financially again...he's jobless yet still can go holiday & go out everyday? Unbelievable. He asked him for $$ too many times. My hus another kind, so stingy & count every cent when i spent (using my own $$) but when come to such issues, he did not even blink his eyes.

Don't you think living with such people everyday can drive you mentally crazy?

 

[zenteno]

yup, gal!!! I think I will go crazy..

erm, what did u do when she forced him to lift his head?

gal, u sure u want to continue like this??

 

[september]

if u take pic of the act tat ur MIL do, mayb u can file a case against her and seek protection against her....tat is she will not be allow to be alone wif ur baby or u within a certain distance.

 

[cuclainne]

i am curious ..

you said "Beco i dun like unhappiness & living with 'violent' thinking people. Perhaps i dun like ahbengs & ahlians since young. That's me. I dun like to miggle with such & get involve with their activities.'

what made you marry into such a family then?

and for your MIL to treat your child like that, and you as a mother does not know how to protect him .. something's just not right!

 

[zenteno]

erm, cuclainne.. dont say that.. it's hurtful.. jia jia you ben nan nian de jin

I dont like my hubby's family and I cant get along with them but coz of my hubby I choose to marry..

 

[flowerygal]

Well, i took pics of my untidy hse & the sofa which was sliced several times by her. Enough to make the judge believe immediately.

When she forced him 2 lift his head all the time, i chose to suffer the shock inside me. What can i do? Push my MIL? Slap her? What can i do? Inside me, i was fuming & wish to kill her immediately. Baby was always in her room. i was complaining about her everyday to my hus...he don't seem to believe. If i overreact, they think that i am suffering from post-natal blues? So many people against 1. So after much planning, i managed to 'rescue' him from her. Initially i had proposed to take him away during my maternity leave but hus objected. He finally agreed after i cried n cried too many times. Ling is right..jia jia you ben nan nian de jin. If i can have my way, i will immediately walk out on my hus since day 1 when they shifted into my plc. i already predicted all these since beginning.

What made me marry into such family? Not as if i know that they be staying with me? I got my flat beco i want to stay away from them. Who allow them to come? Should i blame everything on my hus?

 

[zenteno]

haiz.. no pt blaming anyone..

 

[cuclainne]

ling, i was just curious since in everything we do, we have choices .. it's just a matter of whether it's the right or wrong one, eventually only we will know.

eg some ladies already know their MILs or in-laws already treat them like nobodies but yet they insist on getting married .. after that, they complain x 1 million times over still their in-laws won't change their attitude/ behaviour ..

btw, what is jiajia you ben nan nian de jin .. you need to translate cos i don't understand.

flowerygal, i'm not asking you to be physical with her but you could have said something .. like he's too young to hold his neck up, etc. you fuming inside is not the same as saying/doing something about it. i'm surprised that you and your husband allow your MIL to 'take possession' of your baby.. i feel that you should have stood your ground and your husband should have supported your decision instead of wavering in front of his mother. that only gives her more courage to continue her empress dowager act ..

 

[green_tranquility]

'jiajia you ben nan nian de jin'

Cucl,
I'll try my best to translate that lol. That means every family has its own difficult-to-explain stories.

 

[green_tranquility]

flowerygal,
Only you and your hubby can protect your son from physical abuse. If the parents don't take any action, who will?

Don't wait until your son gets into some serious injury, then both of u cry & regret. By then, it may be too late!!

Don't you ever read news of how an adult's simple carelessness lead to the infant's death?

 

[cuclainne]

green, thanks for the translation.

 

[zenteno]

cuclainne, I agree that we have choices... I suppose its out of love, mixed feelings and emotional side of us and sometimes seriously cant be explained.. well, is not just as easy as we must carry out action & put a stop. In order to make a firm decision & put an end to everything, we need lots of support too.. perhaps, flowergal doesnt have enough.. I feel it's really difficult to understand each and everyone situation and thinking process..

yup, green.. but I feel her husband doesnt seem to be very supportive.. flowergal, pls correct me if I am wrong..

hmm, flowergal.. have u ever thought of divorce?? I am just asking so dont get me wrong..

 

[zenteno]

it means every family has some sort of trouble..

 

[zenteno]

or every family has a skeleton in the cupboard..

 

[zenteno]

cuclainne, dont get me wrong I am not saying that u are wrong to ask her that.. just that after reading "you as a mother does not know how to protect him .. something's just not right!" hmm, seems a little hurtful..

 

[cuclainne]

ling, i don't mean to sound hurtful but that's my point of view based on what flowerygal has written here .. yes, she might have a monster-in-law but i'm just surprised that she has allowed it to go as far as it has .. especially when it came to her own son la ..

anyways, it would be up to her to decide on what to do - no one can tell her .. just that i don't want her to wait until something happens that she'll might regret.

 

[zenteno]

yup, I understand

Hey, Happy Chinese New Year!!

 

[flowerygal]

Hmm, sometimes it seems hopeless when you have such a husband who cant seem to do anything & do not want to get involve. Divorce has been mentioned before but my hus is placed in a very difficult position because of his dad & mum. Hus wanted me to be understanding & continue to tolerate. His dad previously kept warning us that living with MIL will be nightmare but ended up he arranged logisitics to move into my place. MIL instead of shifting out after her violence, she continued to stay. Very thick skinned.

As 4 my son, because of all these, i even wanted to walk out just like that since beginning. i do not want to 'snatch" and take away their grandson. I also do not want to fight with hus & inlaws over my son. They wanted him like gold...i do not think like that. Its not that i do not wish to protect him, the problem is that i do not like to fight? As what i had said earlier, i am not dealing with ordinary woman. She get easily provoked the moment if you dare to talk back at her. Even if you talk nicely to her. I tried before and things got nasty. My MIL since beginning took over my role to be my son's mum so if anything happen to him, she is there for him. Not my call. She cared for him like his real mum. Should anything happen to him, who am i to say? i did voice out my opinions to MIL many times but she just refused to listen. She believed that she is right all the time. Anyway, she said that javen belongs to her family & she has the right. Outrageous thinking.

So now, she hardly get the chance to see my son eversince i let my parents take care of him. Sure heartpain & missed him so much. i just do not want to let my son get near this MIL lest anything bad happen. But even if any misfortune happen, have to accept reality right?

 

[zenteno]

what did your husband say when u mentioned divorce?? well, I know u do not like to fight but u have to fight for your own happiness.. u seriously want your son to grow up in this kind of environment?? "even if any misfortune happen, have to accept reality right" Gal, got to ask yourself can it be prevented? seriously.. what do u really want??

 

[cuclainne]

i could say more but since my words can be hurtful to the ears, i probably shouldn't.

just know this - your life is in no one's hands but your own..

 

[okisan]

Thank for sharing. My MIL is really suck. Will share later.

 

[zenteno]

aiyah.. erm... i dont mean that lah, cuclainne

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

cuclainne

come on, the flowerygal situation with her MIL seems chinese typical this way if not for all. U r married to your hubby and fortunately for u, he is ang moh guy, not chinese guy. ALl the chinese ppl value "face" over anything.

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

flowerygal, i really admire ur guts for taking your son to stay with your own parents instead of your MIL. I can undstd your feelings as i was once in your shoe before.. Very hard to deal with this kind of MIL.

 

[cuclainne]

gosh - to comment is being mean, and not to comment also kena arrow .. sorry for not being part of the hug-and-kisses brigade but i believe that everyone is responsible for their decisions .. and thus their lives are representative of the decisions that they have made.

and please la, let's not drag my husband into this - you think that we don't have occasional clashes because of differences just like any other couple? now you're just race-stereotyping.

at the end of the day, no one can help you but yourself .. so if you choose not to pick yourself up, to even show yourself some basic human rights, then up to you la ..

 

[ninku10]

flowerygal,you shouldn't say such a thing like "But even if any misfortune happen, have to accept reality right?" You are her mother for god sake.your husband especially should make sure nothing happens to him.

I feel that your husband behaves like that becos he is used to growing up this way and and believe she won't do anything to harm him or his family.

My sis also has similar experience with her MIL,only a bit less dramatic as yours. As an outsider, all i can tell her is to get a divorce or else suffer for the rest of her life. But then she replied why divorce when the problems lies with the MIL and not her husband.

I do hope that your husband get to read your posts and "see" the severity of the situation and get the 3 of you out of this situation like a husband should be. If your husband still does nothing, at least you have got the choice to move out of this scary place.
Do something about it when you still have choices.

 

[zenteno]

okok... peace peace peace....hehehe

 

[flowerygal]

Sometimes i am really vexed when people kept asking how are things for me. They asked how come my inlaws aint taking care of my son when they are staying with me. Lots of explanation you know? Even on weekends i hardly bring him back. They said i should not deprive them of my son. Do anyone understand how terrible i feel? It is not as if i want it this way. i am avoiding conflicts & not able to face MIL because of the great phobia. Her violence already too overwhelming for me. Scared until cannot face her. How severe? Everyday i have to shuttle long distance to & fro just to visit my child. How tiring.

Of course most people will understand my situation but some will not because they think i should put up with such people. Just temporary only.

i also asked myself how protective i can be. Seriously i wonder who this child belongs to. My MIL said belongs to her & family. See? My hus, MIL & FIL favored son over girl since beginning. Before my son's gender was revealed, they were hoping so much for a son. Traditional thinking. My responsibility is to give birth a son. Accomplished. Like what i had mentioned earlier, MIL took over my role to be my son's mother & did all sorts of things for him while i stand aside. I gota know someone who had similar MIL and she also had to stand aside. But lucky for her, she was staying with them, not the opposite. Thus she & family moved out after the nasty period.

Correct to say that my hus is used to such & believe that she wont do anything to harm him or his family. Very true. He still thinks that she cant be that bad. Only sometimes acting fierce. Said i should let things bygones.

 

[zenteno]

I suppose this is where u vent your anger and frustration and not hoping for advices and solutions right?? or what so u expect when u post all these??

 

[zenteno]

opps, its do not so

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

Flowergal.
I dun think u r depriving your MIL of their grandson after all what she did to your son.. Hey hello, your son did not come out of your MIL's va**** ok so no outsiders shd interfere in how u decide for your son's welfare.. U did the RIGHT THING in protecting him. Your hubby must be "blind" not to see how your MIL treated his son when he was barely a month old. OMG!!!!
How can u allow your mil to take over the role as the baby's mother n u stand aside. I understood exactly how u felt when i was newly mum to a gal 6 yrs ago. In the end, i could not possibly say it was this old b**** ex mil that drove me to decide i want a divorce with this useless ex hubby but it was! I told my ex hubby since his mum "controlled" him too much and yet wanted to deprive me of my own daughter for chrissake, so i chose faster way out n committed adultery purposely so that divorce can be fast n quick.

what i can say is u r a much stronger woman than me in this MIL issue.

But i think it is a blessing in disguise for me in some way that my divorce(long ago) brought to me.

 

[flowerygal]

Yup, vent my frustrations here...& also try to gain some ideas on how to deal with this kind of bully.

My hus & his family members are so used to this woman thus they feared her & allow her to do anything to her wishes. He is 'blinded' since young because she controlled him since young. Sometimes upbringing is very important. Even my MIL's adopted 3rd son also blended into this family.

How can i allow my MIL to take over the role as baby's mother? Good qns. She asked me to move aside & she took my son away. As simple as that. i only helped to take care when she needed to cook or go out. Otherwise, i do not even have much chance to touch my son. When i tried to carry him, she always come & carried him out from my arms in few mins time. Many times, i wanted to bring my son out for awhile, she was so reluctant & tried to prevent me from going out. So extreme hor? How did she do it? Once, i said i want to bring him to my mum's place, she kept trying to chat with me at the doorstep & then mentioned that my son SURE cry if he sees my parents because he is just like my hus when he was a baby. GOsh, suddenly poured cold water at me? I was rushing to go out & she said such nasty words to me? i was like huh? I said my son is very sociable & do not cry when sees strangers. He even smiled at my parents most of the time when he sees them. i said impossible! How can she said SURE CRY? How can anyone said such words? If she said PERHAPS MAY cry, it may not be so bad. But she said SURE CRY! Then she continued with lots of terrible words... Imagine that usually we seldom talk & suddenly talked so much to me when i want to bring my son out? i got flared up & said GOODBYE! So how do anyone react if you are in my shoes? Be violent at her? If i can have my way, of course i will want to shoot an arrow at her. Should i behave violently just like her to fight over my son with her? Slap her across her face, use knife & threaten her like what she did? Guess what, when i told her about my unhappiness regarding my son, she & my FIL said i am suffering from postnatal depression & overly protective over my son! Yup, how true! Caused by them, not my pregnancy. Gosh. Anyway, too much stories. So much unhappiness about her.

Blur,
Guess You must had suffered alot 6yrs ago.. You had lost faith in your exhus already that's why you purposely committed adultery? But do you get the custody of your daughter?

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

Flowerygal,
Of cos, i was deeply hurted and even could sensed that i was "NOT PART OF my ex hubby's family" and yet he expected me to give way to his family. He thinks his own family is too important than his wife!!!! had a lot of bad quarrels over his family, real shit!. His mum controlled him a lot but how??? i din know actually cos i could not see wat was going on behind closed door but in front of me, they were nice to me. i din know they acted n pretended all cos they wanted him to get spore citizenship for him thru the marriage to me till i found out too late. then I demanded divorce, his mum was too happy and "order" her son to go ahead n snatched my daughter away. I never forget them what they did to me. His mum can act innocent n decent lady but her heart is full of wickedness. evil old lady!!!

Now i put it behind n started afresh. I re-married & now i am quite happy in my life, have a lovely son n responsible hubby is the best thing. I told my current hubby i dun mind going thru good and bad times with him as long as he places me above his parents cos I still believe that a couple will walk together till the end of the journey. My hubby shares the same goal as me for our future. as for my ex hubby, i heard he is still unhappy n lonely despite having our daughter by his side.

 

[green_tranquility]

Blur,
So did u go and visit your daughter? She's afterall your flesh and blood.

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

green
No to be honest. I dunno anything abt her except i heard once she cried for her mummy but her dad scolded her for calling out "mummy" instead of "daddy". hmm i dunoo if it is so pitiful for her to have no "mum" since her parents fought over his paternal family. he still hates me to the core for walking out on him and throwing in the towel. I just dun want to continue sufferin at the famly hand..... Now i matured in my thinkings already and yes it is a such regret and i just hope all children must be with the mothers no matter how bad the outcome(the marriage). It was very hard for me to walk away from my daughter n now i dun want to inflict same pain on my son so i want my son to hv both of his parents by his side.

Many times i did thought of going to family court to get her custody after i heard the father did not provide a comfortable life for my daughter but... i dun want to be cruel to take her away from her dad and the familiar environment that she grew up for the past 7 yrs. oh ya, her 7th birthday is coming on 21 feb. hmm i wonder if her dad n paternal extended family celebrate her birthday.. I hope so n pray to the Father to watch over her constantly.

 

[green_tranquility]

Blur,
How about just going to visit her? Or just mailing a cute card/letter to her? These simple gestures are worth a million $$ to her!

The card method will remove the chance of bumping onto your ex-hb.

 

[zenteno]

make a card for her scrapbooking

 

[flowerygal]

Blur,
It must be really painful for you to go thru so much & to the extent of giving up your daughter. Actually, there were 2 incidents whereby my hus grabbed my son away from me and left me aside. Then i had to go to my parents' plc and cried terribly for 1 night. Guess what After 1 night of crying, i thought it thru & realised that it is so painful to have a child & have someone who took him away from your arms. Then in my heart, i told myself i have to be strong & giving him up has pros & cons. No need to worry so much about taking care of him & i have plenty of freedom. Why stress myself so much in the 1st place? Even if i am divorced, being a single is much better than married to someone who is so cruel.

Perhaps people may said how come in the end my son comes back to me? Beco after that my hus regretted for his acts citing that he wanted son to be by his side & i am depriving him of this. Then i said, i do not wish to fight with him over son. He can have him all by himself & i do not want anything to do with all of them anymore. Sick & tired. It seems better to wash all my memories about them and start anew. Too painful. Even thought of ending my life since it is so hard.

I know your daughter is your 1st child & always in your heart till now. Luckily your new family helps you to move on with life. Not easy. But of course, it still will hurts whenever you think about the past. The temporary pain when my son was taken away which is had was already too much to bear, sorry, i cant imagine the pain you went thru.

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

flowerygal, now u understand and know that to be a mum is not so easy, what some more for a dil and wife? Yes it is still painful for me everytime i think of the past. My hubby encouraged me to move on n look forwards to a better life. He sometimes tells me not to worry too much abt what happens to my dear daughter as he knew she meant a lot to me cos firstborn. He really understood the feeling as his own mum also lost her first born daughter too and was very depressed for a long time think abt 10 yrs later then she finally moved on.

Flowerygal, not to worry abt how i feel. Wat i wanted to say is u r still more luckier than me n made a move to put your son in your own mum's care instead of your mil. This way, you never lose him to your mil. Nobody can understand the pain of seeing your own flesh and blood taken away from u unless U or the other mums experience the loss.

 

[flowerygal]

It was a daring move to bring my son over to let my parents take care. My hus simply dislike this arrangement. But the fact is that i purposely wanted a child is because i want to give my parents a grandchild? I already told him that my parents aint young anymore & i wish to make them happier. They are already over 65yrs old.

Anyway, is your hus ok with you whenever you mentioned about your daughter? Will he get displeased about it?
Just curious how long do you know him before deciding to marry him?

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

Flowerygal
I see. this is something good. your mil really dunno how to respect other ppl as well as herself. sigh.. Why the mils r like that. I must pray that i dun turn out to be a horrible mil in future hee hee.

Thanks to Him, my hubby actually knew abt my daughter and first joked that he wanted my daughter to come n live with us as a family and call him "dad" although he dun mind being a stepfather. He even saw for himself how my ex 's family treated me at the family courts on few occasions. He felt sad for me what else. (i hope he did not feel symapthy for me in the first place).
I met him soon after abt fours months before my divorce was finalised. I think abt 4 months plus but we dated for less than a year before we got ROM.

 

[flowerygal]

Blur,
Wow, he managed to win your heart in such short time. Not easy to love someone else all over again after a failed marriage.

Today i went to see my counsellor & poured out my frustrations to her. She also cant do much for my case except to wait & see. I felt hopeless..but my patience is running out soon. When i can get back my place? i felt so lethargic travelling to & fro to see my son everyday just for a short while yet so pathetic coz i just refused to accept this arrangement.

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

flowerygal
U must try your best to resolve this problem lor. I already numbed to my own pains for so long even after the last email from my ex hubby in 2007. ALthough i still miss my ex hubby and daughter, life still has to go on. I m so glad i have a wonderful family of own now. Can u believe that i am able to get along with my mil as she is a bit easy-going. No control freak (thank god). so far, i hv no complaints abt my current mil but yet i always hate my ex mil for breaking my previous marriage, funny meh, opp things..

 

[flowerygal]

Blur,
How long you were married to your exhus before divorce? Seriously, i just managed to persuade my hus to tell his mum to move out of our place together with the rest of the family in the next few months giving enough time frame for shifting. If he does not succeed, perhaps the only option is to divorce. My tolerance is going to be zero after so long. My counsellor said how can i managed to tolerate so long. i said it was because i thought a miracle may happen thus i waited.

Yes, i am waiting for miracle to happen for a happy ending for me. Otherwise, tragic will happen soon as my marriage is approaching 3yrs soon. If doesnt turn out good, we file for divorce. My poor son will have a broken home. i will have nothing to do with my husband family & no more. Enough is enough. Life is so hard already, i do not wish to live with such a dysfunctional family. Being single is much better isnt it.

Btw, you really stop contacts with your exhus & daughter completely?

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

flowerygal
Hmm wat i could remember was that life was simple n good during dating and courtship stages. However i had a rude shock after ROM n glanced into his family life. I told myself to try my best to blend well into his family before the customary dinner. Then after the customary wedding a day later, his mum started making demands for the wedding jewelleries to be returned to her. More horrible things happened beyond my expectations. Alas i could not stand all the nonsenses and then started quarreling over this and that, etc.. they r such what i never expected in them..... sigh. i Only realised i could not adjust well after a year or so of marriage n finally decided enough was enough. I opted to walk out of the marriage. Not easy for me but i endured while being separated unofficially for 2yrs before the filing(due to hdb flat's MOP). I married for 3 yrs(minus one year for ROM).

Flowerygal, there is no such miracles that will drop on your hand. If u want a miracle, u gotta make it happen. If really hv miracles like that, by then i and my ex would move far far away from his family and there would be no say word of divorce n we could live happily with our daughter. And we could be there for our daughter's first day in nursery, kindgarten and primary school. Now she is in Primary one. I would be with her by now, coaching her in her homeworks but all that did not come true. I was not so happily married to my ex cos of the mil issue for chrissake. Do u know what he said to me just before the filing for div, that make me so so so surprised.. He begged me to wait for him n get remarry only after his mum pass on.. God knows how long do i want to wait for his mum to die. his mum is still strong n healthy. say maybe another 15yrs. ah by then, i might be too old to have another baby..oh please.. why waste my time waiting and waiting for his mum to die. such a idiotic ex husband.

 

[flowerygal]

Blur,
All i can say is that the moment we entered into marriage, life can be full of surprises. For better or worse. We gals thought that when husbands held our hands and said the marriage vows, it seems like it is a assurance from them that we will be protected and loved by them. But it is no fairy tale. It is a matter of luck whether they will be faithful and good to us thereafter.

Everytime, i kept recalling the short few months of married couple life staying at my matrimonial flat before inlaws came to intrude. I tidied & cleaned my place, cooked dinner & enjoyed the comfort in our own privacy. i cooked every weekday. I went marketing every week. Satisfaction in doing chores. I once loved my home. We even have a tv room. Had wanted to have a baby room but all these dreams shattered. I dreaded my own home now (extremely dirty done by them) & dreaded to go home everyday. No mood for anything. But i still try to continue to love my own room now to keep it clean. Thank God that i got bathroom attached, otherwise, i dont know how to continue to stay on. Thank God i also had airpot to boil water. Installed Tv to watch. My room is like a mini house. If i want, i can even buy electric cooker to cook..heeee. My baby playpen & cupboard are also in my room. I also had walk-in wardrobe. I dry my laundry in my room too as there is not enough area to dry liao. Too many people.

Your ex is weird, by asking u to wait till his mum is dead. Only a fool will do that unless MIL's health is very poor & going to die anytime. So nasty of her to request u to return her the jewellery. I thought u can keep? But it is really regretful that the marriage did not work out. Btw, what horrifying things did she do?

 

[pasir_ris_beach]

Wow flowerygal. this is nice n touching post.. Thinking of your post really bring me to my shame. My dream of living happily with my ex was also shattered by the inlaws. For the first 2yrs after the divorce, i honestly dreamed of him very frequently without fail.... at times i found myself crying after i woke up from my dreams. I asked myself why it is unfair that i cannot even return to my family side after marriage and yet his sisters after marriage could remain with their mum, not mum-in-law. Felt very heartbroken that my ex never supported or stood by me. only sided with his family and always think his sisters and mum r right , right, right, right while i m wrong, wrong, wrong, I did try my best to be a good wife n dil but failed. He realised what a bastard he was only after i left him. he finally stood up for me but too late.

Yes she demanded for the jewelleries which she n her relatives gave during the tea ceremony. so i returned everything including a gold coin given by my ex hubby's friend(gave during the dinner) to her. I thought very strange and soemthing wrong but they insisted like that. later i consulted my mum and she said it was for me to keep. Oops omg. Then later after 3 yrs of marriage, without my knowledge, his mum or my ex stole my own set of jewelleries which my parents, late grandparents gave to me. My sis reminded me to kepp them all in the bank safe but i ransacked the whole room upside down. Gone with the wind. I confronted him and of cos he denied it. and accused me of being a thief. I was likw WTF. they r mine and gave to me by my own family. even worse, his sisters n bro in law beat me up. what can i say but to give up for good. My mum did not give birth to me for them to beat up or treat as dirt by them. I m my own mum's daughter. I married my ex hubby cos i loved him too much but he was not into marrying type. yet his family urged him to marry me early.

 

[simpleman]

Reminder,

For all the complain about Mother-in-law.. just remind yourself that you may be one one day..

I guess it is just like the same of being a parent. You won't know the feeling of the parents towards their children until you are one yourself. So, next time when you become a mother-in-law, always take a step backward and remember the sufferings you had when you were a daughter--in-law.. and at least endeavour to be a better mother-in-law..

 

[flowerygal]

Blur,
Gosh, you even got beaten up by them? They must be really from hell. Jewelleries given during wedding are meant for us to keep because they are gifts. Actually, i kept my cash & jewelleries in 2 separate safes at home but i am always so scared that my bro in law will carry them away. He sneaked into my room so many times and opened up my drawers & stole alot of my cash. Luckily it wasnt his 1st time because he did that upteen times since young from my inlaws & his relatives. Always said urgent, he needed cash badly. Obviously to feed his drug habit ba. My hus spoilt his family members too much. Always "suan le suan le". He always ignore the issues that they created.

My counsellor said i should take out PPO against her since last year to resolve my problem. Now is too late already. She said these kind of bullies usually not scare of anything except when law comes in. Otherwise they continue to threaten people and have their way because they know everyone is scared of them. They may even say sorry after the incident but after that, they continue to torture people, then ask for forgiveness again. Haiz...my case abit tough because my inlaws staying with me.

Some guys only realised what they are missing on when we leave them. That happened to me too, but i gave many chances to my hus. Only for him. Did you try to give chance to your exhus to make it up to u? Thank God u managed to pull thru the 1st few yrs of misery after u left them. It makes u a stronger woman right?

 

[troubled_gal]

hi gals,

seem like we are all facing the same probs with MILs.

mayb u gals would like to c the same probs im havin wif my FMIL in the following thread.

http://www.singaporebrides.com/forumboard/messages/5/924513.html?1234068479