@eileen: My sympathies. I, on the other hand, always knew that the dinner banquet was more for the family than for myself. With this little understanding, I've accepted and compromised on several issues (chose the date without too much fuss - no geomancer etc, just a simple look through an almanac online haha!), though MIL is NOT in favour of us choosing dates at all. All a little complicated, but nothing like some harmless omission to appease everyone. As yet, I’ve not dared to broach on what customs and traditions are required of me on the actual day (the timing, the bed thingy, the 4 pieces of gold, etc?!). We weren't given the choice of choosing the venue either, and the huge animal advocate in me have to (literally) swallow their insistence of shark's fin.
I hope the email won’t offend your relatives though I understand you must have written it under a lot of frustration and stress. I know how overwhelming all that planning can be – I was juggling getting an apartment, preparing for the ROM, and now the wedding, the renovation works, planning for a family, and patience can really run thin sometimes when people supposedly on your side are not just being unsupportive but demanding too.
Hope you feel better today, and I’m sure your family will come around and understand that the best they want for you is to be happy.
@rangerlynn: Choosing a photographer really depends on your individual preference of style, and your comfort level with your photographer. You'd need to be comfortable and trusting with his/her direction in producing timeless photographs in the artistic style you like.
That said, some bridal studios do not offer in-house photography, and that could be the reason why you see different entries on the spreadsheet. Nothing to be alarmed about! Some bridal studios offer tie-ins with several photography studios, and couples choose from the list, weighing personal favourite with budget and package details (no. of edited images, hours of photography, layouts/albums, no. of locations etc). Some simply choose to go with the photographer of their choice, regardless of bridal studio tie-ins, more like an al la carte selection.
No right/wrong formula - just pick a photography style you and your husband love, and trust how the right photographer can bring out the best in both of you, and capture the most heartfelt moments.