(2010/05) May 2010 BTB

moonsafarian

New Member
ling, be firm & tell yr sis u can't cater to additional guests, if u don't wish her friends to be there. hmm i rem there was an issue with one of us here about her sister who wanted to invite her own friends for the wedding. Yours huh hehe!

regarding TW, yes, it's extra cold now, my gal pal just returned 1 week ago & taipei was 13deg! She wasn't dressed for the cool weather & had to miss Fisherman's Wharf. Her local host told her the weather's pretty strange in TW recently. My previous trip there in Dec wasn't even so cold i rem!

HK's pretty good for sightseeing & shopping. Food wise, so-so for me, as i find the food generally oily & salty. Not much of a pork person too, & pork is really quite popular in HK, but i do love dim sum. Looking forward to the mini honeymoon in June too
happy.gif
Love, love, love Phuket~

finally bought my dream pearl necklace le! YAYYYYYY~~
 


kaori80

New Member
good for u moon..
ling tell ur sister she cant invite her frend 1..cos u elder than her...

btw ling and moon check with u..for jie mei..odd nos ok or not?
 

missyling

New Member
moon, wow.. congrats on getting hold on the LOVE.

wow amazingly TW is cool down... think weather is really changing... the time i went in mar.. i still wear short n skirt with slipper to walk ard and ppl think we r weird...

am still more interested in tw so will keep a look out how the weather is changing till then.

Yeap gfs oso told me, HK foods won't be my liking as well ... so we are still thinking.

And... yeap lo.. is me and my sis's frds issue again after so many mth... really -_-"!
 

neuross

New Member
evelyn> haha... i think we abt same case leh.. except da 1 making decision & giving me headache is my dad. At least my mum is on my side but she cant do much or say anything to help me cos my dad so stubborn. Actually, i feel damn sianz cos my HTB told me MIL say we asked for alot of things during æ亲. Not like i wan it lor... it's my grandmother & dad. I feel like saying wotever my dad ask for i pay lah then nobody is unhappy but i think dat will make things worst lah. So i juz pretend i dunno & swallow everything in silence. zzzz.....
 

moonsafarian

New Member
lex > initially we have 6 JM & 6 XD, but 1 JM may need to go outstation for work, & 1 XD also may not make it. We've prepared for 12 of them though. Don't really mind 5 or 6, kinda disappointed as we're friends for soooo long and we're always around for one another's wedding... but it's work so can't be helped.

ok i shall not whine about it le, lotsa things to look forward to. like being "mei mei". Gtg catch up on my beauty sleep le! cya all
 

kaori80

New Member
thanks for ur infor moon..
haiz for my case headache lar for jie mei and xiong di..
ya beauty slp i also want tat today i onli slp at 6am..doing some song editing..
 

neuross

New Member
lex> I let my HTB decide on whether he wan me to help him manage his finance or he feel more comfortable doing it himself but will still put $$$ into our joint acc every mth.
 

placid_mind

New Member
Good Morning, ladies…
Just pop by to leave a greetings to you all. Been busy at work in the lab or in meeting. Having jie meis meet up this Friday.
Just to confirm songs for montage. Some other tasks to busy with at work and after work… Not in the mood to work, but my HTB said it cultivating my characters to focus. I hope everyone is having busy but good times nowadays… cheers, take care, eat healthy, sleep well, and beautiful mind throughout the day ahead.

Lydia and Milktea>> noticed your wedding is just in few days time. your final day big day coming… remember to enjoy the day!!! Be the most beautiful bride for your day! My early Congrats to you…
 

moonsafarian

New Member
Good morning too, babes!

Does anyone have any recommendation for a local spa? Would like to book a couple spa session as a gift for my HTB just before the wedding. A good time for us to unwind and relax before the big day.
 

soul_slayer

New Member
Lex > no change after marriage la...the agreement is I contribute abt $100-$200 a mth to the utilities etc...the rest my HTB will pay...I am lazy to pay bills..so once I get my pay I just pass him $200 cash la...easy...we dun have joint acct..haha..dun see a need too yet...very hard to keep track who spent how much when it comes to joint acct...:p

Also I heard stories from frens tt their hubby will control their wives spending and nag when wives spend on clothes, shoes, facial, high tea...I know my HTB wun nag but I dun wanna give him reason to lah..so gd to have separate accts...haha..

1 mth 1 day to my AD..haha...how come I still dun feel excited yet? Everyone keep asking me how I feeling..I said..’like tt loh’...am I weird? Haha...
 

soul_slayer

New Member
^moon^ > how abt Amara? Went there for spa treatment during 1 of my bdays...alternatively can try the one at Bishan Park..heard it’s gd too! Hehe...yup I’m gg for facial with my mum next Monday! Finally..needa get rid of all the clogged pores in my face..*yikes*!
 

moonsafarian

New Member
soul > do u mean amara sanctuary at sentosa? how did u find the massage?

oh i think there's a weekday promotion at the bishan spa. there's a day where HTB & i have to go to ROM to submit some docs. May book a session for that day.
 

renerene

New Member
Ling > Pardon me, I find your sis ridiculous! If she's my sister, I won't even bother to entertain her whinings. Wanna invite friends? Pay up! Or else shut up! Grrr... Can't she wait until her wedding to invite her friends?... Sorry, it just makes my blood boils.

evelyn > KTV!! 30 tables for her friends!! I find it 夸张 too. =P

Sir Lex > We intend to open a joint account for big ticket items meant for common use. Contributions will be based on certain percentage of our take-home salary. I've made it very clear:
"My money is my money, not your money.
Your money is your money, not my money.
Our money is our money, not my money, not your money."

Having said that, I think it is good to constantly keep each other in the loop about our own financial positions.
 

missyling

New Member
Irene: yeap i told her tat as well... dunno what is wrong with her attitude.. even fmily gathering.. she oso asked such thing IF can bring her frds.. sigh dunno wat to say.. my blood boiled till i think if i happen to see a doc.. his measuring blood pressure metre will burst lo.

am intending to dye my hair on the 17th may onwards... are u gals gg to trim ur hair or juz leave it? myco-o saw my hair lenght and went WOW ur hair so long nw ar... am tinking should i leave it or trim it abit.
 

joey_cat

New Member
Ling - your sister really strange la... if my sis dare to do this to me, she will get wrack left right center by all the family members...

Plan to colour my hair around 17th as well... my MUA say no need to do antying or trim to the hair.. as she will take care of it for me on that day.. (will bum up anyway... trim or without it wil be the same.... hahah). Will go do something to my hair after the AD.
 

moonsafarian

New Member
Ling > I coloured & cut my hair in Dec for PS in Jan. Following the new MUA's suggestion, I re-coloured my hair & layered it, but was told not to do treatment as smooth & fine hair is more difficult to style, esp if your hair gotta be set in curls. During the PS, my curls flattened out after a while! Was worried my hair's not enough for drama hair, but the MUA has fake hair to add on the volume hehe!
 

missyling

New Member
moon, yeap my hair was fine too so i used fake hair and curls to add in volume.

going to do hair spa treatment after wedding day.. cannot imagine how much damaged the hair gotten in.
 

moonsafarian

New Member
U're right! I shd probably pop by a salon nearby to do hair treatment the next day too. So worried my HTB gets drunk after being tekan by our "evil" friends. Last sat we had a sample of the experience during our pre-wedding party le. I told him if he gets drunk i'll go out on my own the next morning & let him stay in the room puke his guts out :X

Anyone doing hair-combing ceremony? Is a big wall mirror needed? I only know u gotta sit in front of the lit dragon candles and put some red thread & a pair of scissors on the table. Wear new PJs/clothes and bedroom slippers. Did i miss out anything?
 

neuross

New Member
Ling> i will juz trim my hair a bit. Mabbe 1/2" juz to keep da ends neat. All my frens & colleagues oso say my hair so long, dun feel hot meh? I told them after wedding, i will probably chop them off liao lah.
 

neuross

New Member
^moon^> small, table mirror will do liao. yi si yi si only. no need big mirror de lah :D but i'm not having hair combing ceremony.
 

missyling

New Member
moon, hehe i am not wearing bedroom slipper. Was told if we don't want to do it the nite before, can yi si yi si do on the AD day b4 the mua do our hair up. but i tink i will do on the nite b4. if not, ad so many ppl... sure got ppl say tis n dat.. end up more issue.
 

missyling

New Member
ladies.. was toking to jean about cake... Just to share what i usually will do...

if you ladies are getting butter cake and had extra of it, you can store it in freezer to last it for @ least 1mth with cling wrap OR slice it and baked it dry to munch as cookies texture.
 

neuross

New Member
Morning gals...

As da day draws nearer, i feel damn sianz. Very frustrated over da table arrangements. Last min. my HTB's grandpa wanna add 3 tables. Now it reaches restaurant max capacity liao. We hv quite a few tables with 11 pax cos all belong to 1 grp, cannot break up to other table. I feel so paiseh!!! Wait pple think we very gian ang bao, invite until overflow. I dun feel like getting married liao lah!
 

neuross

New Member
thx Candy. I'm trying my best but my emotions super unstable now. Any moment oso can break down & cry. I feel damn bad for venting my frustrations on my HTB everyday cos it's not his fault. But his parents & grandparents are da ones whom invited all their frens (whom we dun even know) & took up so many tables. I'm angry cos he keep telling me he can't do anything to stop them. I really need a place to scream out my 委屈 & hide till AD.

8 tables - bride's relatives
8 tables - groom's relatives
12 tables - bride & groom's frens
9 tables - groom's parents & grandparents frens

My MIL keep telling us dun panic, relax ~ Not everybody will turn up one. Then why invite so many pple in da 1st place??!! Why can't they RSVP??? Open up all tables in da restaurant till no spare table & expect me to RELAX??? WHAT A JOKE!!! TY manz...
 

missyling

New Member
WOW nana... get ur hb's granparent & parent to march in together la...

sigh things isn't gg smoothly on my side as well but luckily we find a NOT very small or very BIG rest... they wan more oso cannot coz ours oso max till if they want more... have to sit by the riverside le..

RSVP! seriously dunno why older folks cannot do so.. its like asking us to cfm the tables den if no one turn up... we L L got to pay for it and go back to claim back the leftover tables another time. Hate this logic from them.

my side:

5 tables - brides relative
6 tables - groom relatives
5 + ( 1kiv) tables - our frds
4 tables - FIL frds !!!!!!
 

candycandy001

Active Member
Wah! that is a lot.. but why they didnt say in advance when discussing the number of tables? Are they paying?

Yes, not all wil come. But sometimes not invited ppl will come too, e.g. this one Ah boy's gf, that one Ah Girl's bf... 37tables, did u inform the hotel/restaurant le? just in case they unable to cope.
 

neuross

New Member
Candy> EXACTLY! They only told us need 15 tables... i tot ok lah... oni son & oni grandson, mabbe inviting all relatives. Who knows oni 8 tables are relatives, 5 tables are their frens/neighbours. Then a few days ago HTB's grandpa say he want 3 tables! I damn pissed! Then nobody tok abt who will pay for da tables & my HTB dun dare to ask. They all should know my HTB dun hv alot of savings lor!
 

missyling

New Member
Nana: mmm maybe should try and asked.. if not, wait they think the $$ should be paid by u 2.. 17 tables alone on their side alone is damm !!!! chor .. after wedding.. cfm all saving gone or be in debts.
 

soul_slayer

New Member
What do you all mean by who shld pay? I take it as means tt all AB should be returned to the couple right? Afterall we are the ones paying for the wedding dinner no?

For my case, I will take back all ABs lah..if there's gain, good for us can use for HM...if loss we have to bear it ourselves..*sianz*

I don't think it's right for our IL or parents to demand so many tables...are they trying to wipe out our savings? And end up we have to sleep on the street cos cannot afford house/reno?!
 

missyling

New Member
soul.

some traditional parent hor. will take the ang bao esp for the lady side.

tat is why long before, i know its rude to ask my parent abt it but i went ahead and ask if they want to take pin jin or take angbao $$$.. my dad was really very understanding, he said if relative gave it to him, he will pass it to us after tat. Cause dun wan us to land in debt.

As for hb side, sigh
cfm is gg to make a big lost.
 

neuross

New Member
Ling> I told my HTB soooo many times liao. He keep saying how to ask parents this kinda sensitive subject? Keep telling me dun hv to worry, everything he bear on his own. He juz dun get it lah. *sigh* Damn sianz now... skali we quarrel everyday from now till 2 wks later dun wanna get married liao. LOL!
 

neuross

New Member
Soul slayer> Normally, according to traditions, those tables given to bride's parents, they get to keep all ang bao. If bride's parents nice enough to return da couple all or partial of da ang bao then gd for them lah. Otherwise, juz hv to swallow everything yourself. For groom's side, normally ang bao all give back couple then up to couple wanna give a bit to parents as yi si yi si or not. BUT! Some old fashion parents or grandparents may wanna keep da ang bao for those frens they invited.
 

moonsafarian

New Member
I know some families keep the red packets for the tables given to them, even grooms' parents. What's mortifying is i've heared some parents wanna "earn" from their children's weddings. My personal opinion is that it's a very "FENG JIAN" type of thinking. Something I dun care for and will not accept.

For my case, my parents have 3 tables of relatives and I will let them keep the ang baos. My dear mom has been ever supportive and takes good care of my HTB & I (different story with indifferent ILs). My mom asked me if my dad could invite his churchmates and i said "of coz!" My mom did not invite any friends or colleagues, neither did my brother, though i've asked them too. They know I'll like to manage a small wedding, hence they also "zi dong". My parents have offered to return us the ang baos for the 4th table. That's what families are for, I feel, you "zi dong" a bit, I "zi dong" a bit.

I really don't see why we cannot ask our parents how many tables they wanna take lor. Come on, they are your nearest & dearest. What cannot be discussed with the people who gave birth to you?
 

moonsafarian

New Member
Goodness, Ling, your FIL has 4 tables of friends, around 20% if your attendance le!

Nana > HTB's grandpa has 3 tables for friends? If your HTB dun dare to ask his family, then u'd better not say anything, later kena gossip. Then u guys gotta be prepared to pay for the tables le, and keep your fingers crossed the ang baos get returned to you, hehe!

For me, estimated number of tables:
HTB's relatives: 4
FMIL's friends: 1
HTB's colleagues & friends: 5
My relatives: 3
My dad's churchmates: 1
My colleagues & friends: 5

I think it's a healthy mix and I've no complaints about the tables so far, though my HTB kept on adding more friends, even those he hasn't seen for years or those who aren't very close!! Mad guy~
 

candycandy001

Active Member
Nana> say more also no use. I agreed with ^moon^, wedding banquet is one time event, but you stil have long way to go with you hubby and IL. If kena gossip, will b hard time for u in future...

If they dont willing to return the AB, still ok. Worse, some grandparents they act like "treating" their friends, give AB also dont wan to take. Aihz...
 

missyling

New Member
Nana: man and their ego.. as if its $2 nia.. can everythings bao ka liao... sigh

moon, u know what my FIL said? OH he still had alots of uninvited frds lo.. i was like !!! is he the one getting married? really bth him.. give him an cm.. he want a metre.

i wish to tell him, we oso had alots of relatives and frds not invited as well. Must know the limit mah.. he any dick tom or harry oso invite. Sianz.
 

moonsafarian

New Member
May strength, patience & perseverence be with all of you as we approach the month of May. I don't know about you babes, but i really need those qualities, hehe~

Congrats to lydia & milktea on your upcoming big day this weekend *blow kiss*
 

soul_slayer

New Member
Wah...but I feel it's your own son and daughter's wedding..how can our parents and IL feel gd abt taking our $$? I mean think abt it this way..when we r parents next time..how will we feel by asking for so many tables and ur poor daughter or son have to fork out for all these??

Why they dun have such feelings? Imagine ur son cannot pay..they go in debt and then end up borrow $$ from IL and parents..go back to square one..right? hahaha...so weird one...

My mum is ok with not taking tables but it's my dad who's the traditional one..so I told him.."U want tables..ok loh I marry at 35-40 yrs old' ..Let me save enough $$...My mum got scared loh..haha..cos she's dying to see her daughters marry off..*lol*..so she nag at my dad..and end up they not taking any tables AB..

For mine :

Bride's Relatives : 7 tables
Groom's Relatives : 3 tables
Bride's Frens : 4 tables
Groom's Frens : 5 tables
and 1 VIP table, total 20 tables...hehe..
 

soul_slayer

New Member
I think in the past..the bride's parents can 'take' more tables cos the bride marry off will end up be slave to the groom's side..like a maid...but I told my mum..I marry off...cannot cook, iron, clean house...end up more of liability loh..when my MIL gotta cook for me even and hire maid to iron my clothes...then like tt shld be my parents pay my MIL? hahaha...
 

kaori80

New Member
Hi All,
just to check on the AD we need to give ang bao to the relative kids?if need rather how much to give etc?
pls advise me.
thanks
 

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