(2010/05) May 2010 BTB

[placid_mind]

Ling>> take care gal, have honey drinks for your throats... no heaty fried food..wish you speedy recover...

ladies>> good good monday morning everyone... An indeed a very good busy weekends for me, settled most things planned for the weekends...
Sat busy with house cleaning, and sunday on wedding.. Went Chinatown to settle my GDL stuffs... hee.. got all the items le... and it cost 400 over bucks for us... the da yuan and xiao yuan is the most expensive of all since we got more of it... some of the items my FMIL didnt request but my mum also get for them, eg. towels

Collected my ablums and settled with father's coat and my bouquet for AD.


Missysee>> The BS messed up one of my ablum squences... yesterday when i flipped the indoor ablums, the pic squence is not what we requested.. told them, and the lady said can change and in time for my AD. SO careless of them!

Also, I went to chinatown to get my GDL stuffs… think that shop is the one you went… the other side for shophouses one, the lady is from china one.. And hor, I also got 2 fans, one for throwing, and another is for fanning the right way in car from places to places… I asked her le, the throwing fan and not looking back is for my mum to pick up, meaning I marry off only change sir name but not my name.. And the other fan is to scoop up the air 3 times towards us us to bring good fortunes and luck along with us.

 

[moonsafarian]

Soul, oh yes, u live in yishun too, i forgot

Another source for wedding cakes is Sweetest Moments. I collected a few boxes of cakes for GDL yesterday. They also do orders on cupcakes. Fondant 6" is $55, cupcakes is around $2/each. The prices are lower, but i think they have limited designs. Free delivery for orders above $200!

Ling, did u view the album layout in its full resolution? Sometimes there can even be more mistakes made on their part, just that we didn't notice. i took 2 hours each time to go through the album. Initially, the designer opened the album in a thumbnail version, but i made her show me the original size.

 

[moonsafarian]

Quite a fruitful weekend for me. Confirmed designs with florist, HTB bought a bracelet for me, trial makeup with new MUA and managed to get FMIL her gown at the same City Plaza shop. She nearly chose the colour purple, but we kind of persuaded her to pick another gown. (Mom is wearing purple, hehe!)

Speaking of makeup, i thot the makeup done by the MUA was great. VERY different kind of look from the makeup done by the BS MUA. Will put up a couple of photos in FB this afternoon. Give me your feedback ya?

BUT i have this feeling that he isn't fantastic with hairstyling. HTB felt the same. There wasn't trial with my hair, though we discussed abt hairstyles. He suggested a high ponytail, nicely scrunched up, but i feel that my WG doesn't suit such a youngish, teeny-bopper hairstyle. I really must consider if i'm paying good money for his services.... He was the MUA who did Jeanette Aw's makeup last night during the Star Awards. Thought her makeup was great, but for some TCS artistes, hair is handled by Passion Hair Salon, not my MUA lor...

Kind of in a panic now for not having a confirmed MUA.

 

[missyling]

moon, yeap i did..i made him blow up to the actual pic size for us to see... it was really "no eye see man" even my co-o agreed something is wrong..

if edit le is worst den raw one... den i might as well take the raw version, isn't it..

hopefully sunday will be able to view a satisfy version.

 

[fiona87]

Hi, can anyone share with me the contract where hubby need to sign before going into the room..
[email protected]
my wedding actual day is on the 25 May.. any more idea for the gate crash? so many things to think..

 

[renerene]

evelyn > this is what I do for friends...
If I know my friend's partner personally: Mary & John. Otherwise, Mary & Partner.
I haven't gotten those cards for relatives ready, I'll most probably let my parents decide how they want it to be.

milktea > What about $38 or $58? Sometimes, a simple "thank you" card with persomalised message of appreciation is a very heart-warming gesture for service personnel too.

Cat > Understand your frustrations... There were times I get upset when things don't go the way I hope for due to objections from my own parents. Well, ditch that "report card", no point keeping record of black marks and constantly adding to the list to remind yourself how things are imperfect. Life is about learning and working around obstacles... A list of things to be grateful for will be much more meaningful, isn't it?

Hope things goes smoothly for you from now onwards. Cheers!

^moon^ > You've done quite a lot of research on hairdo, why not show him what you want?

fiona > There is no "contract" that the groom "need to" sign before entering the room lah... Haha... I understand what you are trying to say tho'. I have no gatecrashing, but if it were for me, I'd rather htb prepare his own list of commitments on his own accord than me doing it and forcing those expectations down his throat... Again, that's me and my personal preference.

 

[missyling]

The contract is all made up by the bride or JM de.. all benefits to the brides in the end.. BUT seriously, u tink guys will followed all closely? its just for effects on the morning express to laff over.

 

[soul_slayer]

Fiona > Ya agree with Ling..the JMs shld be the one preparing with some input from the bride..so what you can do is to give some suggestions to your JMs ba..hee..

Irene > oh gd idea! I think I will get a "Thank You" card for my solemnizer too..gee..why din I think of tt..ok tt goes into my to-do list! haha..

^moon^ > I have decided on my wedding cake le...not gg to be cupcakes tho'..gonna be a big brownie cake from P.Osh...(it's really tasty)..haha...the shop is at Dhoby Ghaut...keke...

Btw any suggestions for AD Photoshoot?? Been recce-ing a few places...for mine I chose West Coast Park...wonder if there's any other gd places ard Clementi?

 

[moonsafarian]

Soul > dono if Portsdown is considered near Clementi. I went there for pre-wedding PS. Love the place!! Depends on what "backdrop" u'll like for AD PS. The area has colonial houses and a few dining places that'll look great on photos. Hmm haven't done recce for AD PS yet. Probably somewhere vibrant & "action packed".

 

[moonsafarian]

I've uploaded a few photos on the trial makeup session in my FB album. Pls do give me yr feedback, babes.

My HTB said it looked like i've done the makeup myself, and since there wasn't trial on hair, we're both wondering if this MUA is worth splurging on...

 

[amanda1982]

ladies, i had a really big big problem here and i really need a place to let this thing out of me cos i dun think i can find anyone to talk to in the office. i wan to let it out before i go crazy or deep into depression. i had been crying for the last few hrs till my eyes are very sore and red. but i am trying to avoid my colleagues glaze.

yesterday, unknown to me, my brother drove my parents around to help me give out wedding invitation cards. when i got home at abt 8.30pm, i was very surprised to see him at home when he usual is not at home at this time. he said to me: "all I can say is i got into a huge arguement with my gf all becos of helping you to send your invitation cards. dun ask anymore!"

ok fine, i avoid asking him wat happen althou i really wish to know. i dun wan him to be more sad or angry or watever he is feeling then. then at nite when my parents are back, i ask my mum wat happen. she said he got into a huge arguement with his gf becos they are suppose to go for some celebration with my bf's gf mum. but this is unknown to my mum and my bro didnt tell her. my mum at that time feel very sad. i also feel very bad cos i didnt go with them. i was at that time engaged at my hubby's grandma (father side) place for some gathering. i have nv meet them before so my hubby insisted tat i should go. if i didnt go but choose to go with my parents, i dun know the above will happen anot.

just this morning, my bro msg me saying tat all thanks to me, he lost his gf. telling me tat to remove her parents' & her name whom i am inviting to my wedding. he say he will not wan to come to my wedding too. i totally collaped. i nv know my bro can treat me like tat and put full blame on me. first of all, i really dun know wat is happening except only know they argued which is common. only when i comment in his FB, another person ask me to stay out of the pic and should do things myself. i got so so so pissed that i msg tat person. i didnt know wat is happening and why everyone is blaming on me. is it tat i dead then it will stop. if this is the way, i will do so. then she replied to ask me to cool down. i frankly tell her i really dun know wat is happening. then she told me abt wat really happen. i dun know who is really at fault. partly i cant push this fault away cos i feel is my own stuff and i should do it myself. but now is too late.

i am now having lots of mixed feelings; very sad, lost and i really have a rush feeling to cancel this wedding. anyway no one will wan to attend it. now i m more worry of my mum, i scare she will keep blame herself ad not happy.

I AM REALLY LOST!!

 

[missysee]

Soul> arrh... The PG and hotel co-o make it sound easy to sync the motion and music wor.. I think also depend on the AV coordinator that day.. Hmm.. no idea also..

near clementi..How abt Chinese Garden? I am gg to Little Guilin which is very near our new place. Then if got time, I will drop by ION orchard after my mum's side tea ceremony which is very near our hotel. So that the photos dun turn out all greenery only.

Milktea> I also thought of that.. but like u say, $68 is too much and $28 makes me look stingy.. Duno why my mum dun allow me give $48 coz pandang. So i also stuck with this 2 figures for many heleprs..

Ling> they better do it properly before ur AD which is coming soon loh! They already slow hand slow leg and yet didnt do a proper job!

Placid> aiyoh.. hope they can reprint everything by next week? How come ur GDL items so exp huh? or maybe becoz I didnt get the bowls set from them..

Cat> I understand what u mean... I kena before and am trying to erase my black records with mum now. But dun worry, ur mum will forget de... Now i ask my mum for opinion for any wedding stuff which requires her attn and try to sound very humble when asking her opinion... Sometimes when I convey msg, have to add honey to it.. hee..

 

[missysee]

Amanda... I'm so sorry what happened.. Pls dun blame yourself.. and as a mutual party, I would think it's your bro who should highlight to your mum so that they could stop sending sending invites. It's totally not your fault at all. Not as if u told him NOT to attend his gf function and continue driving ur mum around to send invites right? Maybe he's just blaming u becoz he's in super bad mood. When one is in trouble, it's natural to put the blame on another in order to feel better... So just let him cool off?
And who the hell is that person to comment when he/she doesn't know anything.. Some people are just being blunt to comment.. Maybe can ask ur mum to speak to ur bro?

Let him cool down first... Nothing u say now will appease him. Do u know the gf personally? able to talk to her to explain?

I was just abt to complain abt my unhappy things and saw yours.. oh mine.. urs sounds very serious.. What more stress can a BTB tarhan?

 

[neuross]

Milktea> My boss oso stuck in Germany since last Friday. His mood damn bad. Call every few mins to scold pple. Even wkend oso call his PA to make noise. Fly anywhere oso can as long as he get out of there but problem is airport CLOSED siah...

Me & my HTB wanna give ang bao to all da waiters/waitresses, chefs & Manager on dat day. Cos we think da effort comes from everybody, not juz da manager/coordinator. We juz gonna give small ang bao as a token of appreciation lah. Then mabbe write a good testimonial on their feedback website if everything turns out well ^^

 

[moonsafarian]

Amanda > my initial reaction when i read yr post was, "yeah, how mature of your bro's gf & your bro to blame their failed relationship on someone else (family, for that matter!)."

Then i re-read yr post again, and as most people would say, each family has their own set of problems. Whether or not cancelling the appt with his gf & her mom is beside the point. IMO, i feel that sometimes one has to weigh the importance of matters that need to be attended. Yr brother must have felt visiting yr relatives to issue the invites was more important than celebrating the birthday, hence he went ahead to do what he wished to do. I feel probably he's very upset abt how the whole situation turned out, and his unkind words to u were not intended.

It's always easier to blame someone else when a problem occurs, but when everything goes smoothly, nobody gets credit, as it's expected to turn out well. I'm sorry that u're feeling upset about it, and if u feel u have no fault in it, then dun take up the blame for someone else. Anyway, it isn't the time to play the blame game, but to rectify the situation as best as u can. Whatever transpired between your bro & his gf could have been the catalyst for many other issues. You really wouldn't know, hence dun shoulder the blame anymore, girl. U have a beautuful wedding waiting to happen for u. Keep the faith that your loved ones will be standing by you to see you through.

 

[neuross]

Fiona> Initially, I oso thought of copying other's Love Contract cos I super lazy to think of something myself but my jiemei knocked some sense into my brain that it would be more fun to create da Love Contract yourself, if u really want 1. As we all know, our hubby is definitely not gonna live according to dat love contract after wedding. It's all for da fun & laughter, add-on entertain to morning highlight video.

For example, my HTB love to play World of Warcraft (WoW). I listed out "If we have baby in the future, I will delete all my WoW characters and stop gaming so that I can take care of our baby." He likes to ask me go cook supper for him in da middle of da nite when I wanna go sleep, so I listed out "I will never bug you to cook supper for me in the middle of the night but I will go anywhere, anytime in Singapore to get your favourite food when you have cravings."

Only you know your hubby best. So it's more fun if you create da Love Contract yourself ^^

 

[amanda1982]

i am totally lost in this. dun know how to face it.

 

[psying]

yea cat, i agree..ditch that report card...cheer up...many things just dont go the way we want it to be...=)) u done wat u can..

oh my amanda, i can feel u mus be super upset..jus because yr bro cant attend the gf event den end up losing her..how "understanding leh" ...cant the gf be a little bit understanding..

im sure yr brother mus have said those anger words..he is willing to help for the invites cards but nv expect the gf or situation to turn out so bad...

dont blame yrself...pple will still go yr wedding....go on prepare yr wedding..be a happy bride...you cnt please everyone..and dont care n hurt yrself with those other pple comment who know nothing!

=)

im sad too..anione going europe for honeymoon? i booked my tickets n hotels..now...im not sure if i should cancel it..wat u all think..so sad..i put in so much effort for the planning...haiz

 

[joey_cat]

Amanda: So sorry to hear what happened to you, you really have a bad bad day. I understand how you feel now, hopeless, bad, depress . And the worse thing is having no body to talk to.. Is ok, we have each other here … let out your feeling, see if our opinion helps..

Like Missysee mentioned, maybe is good to talk to the gf??? I am not sure how old they are, but breaking up because of this incident is a bit too overdone.

It is not your fault, don’t blame it on yourself.. now the important thing is to see if there is a way out to mend the thing, rather than feeling down. Jia You. You have all of us here to share your stress.

 

[missyling]

missysee: ya lo they better don't make me waste my time on making trips down again and again..

amanda: BIg hugz...

seriously from reading it, ur bro's gf gave me a feeling that she is trying to be diffcult like trying to find a "time" to dump ur bro away. And now got a "scapegoat" U on the time to let her make use.

1st of all.... u didn't or ur mum didn't force ur bro to NOT to go to the function @ her side. If its so important, she should have make it a point to her bf ( ur bro) no matter how, he got to attend it.

Let him cool down or tok to him again.. OR if u r on talking term with tat gal.. tried to talk to her and find out what really happen.

 

[candycandy001]

Amanda, jiayou...

I dont know what to say to make you feel better but I think you are at fault. I agreed with moon, your bro and gf cannot just simply break off due to a single issue (your wedding). Cheers up!

 

[placid_mind]

Amanda>>. Hmm...
your brother is just angry so do not take his words into heart... though its already hurting if u keep thinking about it now. he is hot at his boiling point, especially his gf's acts to him...thats very strange sometimes, pple need to respect one another, forgive me saying about his gf... I can understand his gf can be mad with him also, probably agued with him for treating her mum's bd lightly but I see not so serious to break off cos of it. And for considerate pple, probably should understand your side...
Do not let this to make yourself down...you are not to blame on this. probably we learnt that communication is impaortant... dunno, somehow, i feel ur brother's gf is not so good wor... cos she is now not understanding your mum's position... or probably she feel ur brother is treating mum more important than her that why she feel upset? but frankly speaking, its really not your fault nor your mum, your brother somehow didnt handle properly on this, so venting his anger on you.
Dont cry dont cry gal....a big hug for you. let think of solution now...
Wedding not need to cancel cos of this but to continue on...ur HTB will suffer wor... waited so long for the day and u wanna cancel for a thrid parnter?? wait a couple of days for your brother to cool down, and talk to him again... you are still his sister afterall... blood is thicker than water...he is younger than u is it??
if so, forgive him for hurting you with his words..
A angry man comes with a cruel tongue... so do not take his words into heart...
Along the wedding prepartaion, there is bound to have some conflicts here and there... this make us grows and making us to handle things like "adult , matured, rounded" way...

 

[amanda1982]

i think i m in no postition to talk to his gf. not tat i dun wan but i think she also need to cool off first. i dun know how to comment and it does not will make me feel any better. i feel like hiding somewhere where no one can find me till after my wedding date.

 

[neuross]

Amanda> Wotever I wanna say, they all hv already said it. Dun think so much. Nothing much u can do abt it. It's really not your fault cos u dunno anything. Your bro could hv told u abt his plan to meet his gf's mum, rather than agreeing to help u then later push all blame to you. I personally think that his gf hv over reacted too. Unless, he said something wrong during their quarrel. If u r close with ur bro's gf & would like to help, u may wanna help clarify. Otherwise, leave it lah. Continue with ur wedding preparations, count down to AD & try to be happy bride! I oso face some hiccups throughout whole wedding preparations but I either try to accommodate it, ignore it, play taichi, watsoever, I juz wanna be a happy bride on my AD. I dun care!!!! hahaha... *going insane liao*

 

[joey_cat]

I have a bad day since last night as well. I woke at 5am and unable to sleep after that.

I have a bad fight with my mom, and I feel like I am really innocent in this whole incident. We had a very bad start on the wedding preparation. After several incident, I learned my lesson to ask her, double check, triple check with her.. but yet, still things can go wrong..

Incident 1: my HTB lost 4kgs due to the housing reno.. he was so stressed up to get the house ready so we can “Lu Huo†(move in the new house ritual) this Sunday… (my parents are flying down to celebrate with us, distributing cards, buy mei mei cloths for them etc).. because I don’t want my HTB to be so stressed up, I called my mom last wk to ask her if it is ok to “Lu Huo†after the wedding.. if we have this after the wedding, whether I can still Married out from our new house.. She mentioned it is ok, as many of my father’s customer also do so after they renovated the house.. no need to stress up etc etc.. but when I tell her again last night, she freak out.. and mentioned, I can’t married out the house if I don’t have the move in ceremony, as the house doesn’t belongs to me.. she though I was mentioned about the “house warming partyâ€â€¦ she say NO ONE DO THINGS LIKE THAT.. how can I do things like this etc etc… kena left right center for this..

Incident 2: after hearing what some couples been through the TiQing and GDL Ang Pow argument.. I learned my lesson and ask about the step by step procedures, as I need to tell my IL (who has no ideal at all how this things should work, nor do we…), I understand the Groom will need to give AngPow to the Brides’ parents, then the brides side will need to return.. She last time jokingly mentioned even if we give S$9.99, as long as it got good meaning, she is ok.. she will return 0.99 to my husband..

Last night I asked her, if my husband is to give 999, will she return $900 or S99.. (as I totally have no ideal how this things work…if she will return the “bigger portionâ€, I will ask my HTB to give $9999 as it look nicer, he will get back $9000 anyway).. She this time TOTALLY FREAK OUT.. and say how can I ask her how much she will return, how can I BARGAIN with her (as I ask “isn’t to return $900? With the intention of giving a “bigger one – S$9999â€)… goodness me.. I give them pocket money every month since I started work.. and now the bank a/c has at least several 10ks in it… I wont even look at those money, will I “bargain†with her on the S$900.. again.. my bad for being asking the stupid questions… and I being labeled as “ungrateful†daughter.. who only cares about MONEY..

Incident 3 – mom only requested fruits and 2 bottles of wine as GDL, with 2 red cloths and 2 Ang Pow.. (one for TiQing, one for GDL as we combined both)…. She say is only for “ceremonyâ€, everything can.. hence, as I thought 1 wine will be returned to my HTB, one she will keep (which eventually, will still pass to me as unlikely she will carry out the borders..).. I double confirmed with her if she will returned the wine (as my HTB has collection of wines… if she is going to drink or take out of SG, I will need to make sure those we get for the GDL is duty paid, and not from my hubby favorite collection..) Guess what.. that I am being “not sincereâ€.. (I should have go and buy it.. instead of taking from our existing stock and expected it to be returned..).. Well, if not she mentioned “everything ok… she is fine.. etcâ€â€¦ I wouldn’t have even thought of saving that few bucks to get this from her.. Now, she is so mad that she say don’t want to “trouble†us.. she don’t want any wine.. just the fruits will do….

And my ILs….. FIL don’t want to wear coat.. MIL don’t want me to bring her to buy cloths… (she is going to wear a pants and get some top from OG during their sales…. Faint).. when I tell this to my parents and my HTB.. they objected violently.. and say “cannotâ€.. if my ILs not wear nicely, my parents also cannot wear nicely.. (But they wanted to, since this is the first time marrying a daughter).. my HTB say “CANNOT, look very bad on everyone…â€.. guest what.. the task is on my shoulder to persuade my FIL to wear a coat and my MIL to get something decent for our wedding…..

I didn’t smile at all for the whole day.. am so up sad about this whole incident happening over the wkend… again like Amanda.. I have no one to talk to on this… the only way is to “blah†out here… bear with me babes… but I really feel so depress that I feel like crying…

 

[placid_mind]

missysee>> I brought a lot of xiao yuan and da yuan.. cost about 100 bucks on them.. and i think thats increased the total cost a lots..
I try upload my GDL stuffs tonight if not too late... after work need to go BS to settle my ablum... they really messed up lor, then must ask them to committ to give the correct ablum lastest by mid May. Hmm... sat evening also quarrelled with my HTB, cos of his insensitive words he said to me. was really mad and hurting... got the thought to cancel the wedding also... and cried... we only settled our arguement in early morning and on sunday back normal to get GDL and albums. feel most of us are stressed and tensed up when wedding getting nearer... Must learn to relax.. really have to... how was ur weekends?? u mentioned u have something to say....

 

[amanda1982]

i seem tat i cant talk to anyone, cos once i talk abt it, i really wan to cry. my eyes are now sore and red. my colleagues asked me, i just brushed off with senstive eyes.

i jus afraid to go home and see my mum being so sad. i feel like a bad bad daughter. GOD PLEASE HELP ME TO OVERCOME ALL THESE!!

 

[missyling]

moon, he suggested the hair style to be pony tail might be caused recently most of the artists are using that.. 1st is fann wong wedding then i saw a blogger ROM oso having pony tail style then ytd the Jeanette Aw's hair oso in pony tail...

 

[neuross]

Cat> I have same problem as u in da beginning when I started my wedding preparations leh. My MIL hv no idea abt traditional customery stuff & wanna do w/o everything like da way she marry off her daughter with simple solemnization & buffet dinner dats it but my dad is very into traditions cos he say our grandma still around, muz respect her. Everything muz still follow traditions. Moreover, I'm his only daughter, he wan me to marry off nicely. In da end, both side agreed to do away with comb hair ceremony, an chuang ceremony, certain useless stuff from GDL we dun wan...etc Other meaningful tradition we still follow. I tell u... half fcuk like this is worst, u dunno wot has to be done or not. In da end I gave up ~ They tell me then I do. Dun tell me, i pretend I dunno then no need to do. I almost hv conflict with my dad too when discussing abt da PIN JING, how many tables to give him...etc Cos he think he deserves it, how come i helping my HTB to negotiate. Nvm, I oso gave in. Wot he want, we give. As long as he dunno I got help too. So everybody is happy! I dun care lor ~~

 

[neuross]

Amanda> I know how u feel cos I'm oso very emo type. Feel like talking things out to somebody but talk only cry. I think after ranting out here is enuff le lah. Dun tok abt it liao or else u cannot stop crying. Moreover, da more u tok abt it, da more u think abt it then cry again. So better dun think, dun talk abt this issue anymore. Go look at ur pretty wedding album & think abt ur big day!

 

[moonsafarian]

ling > i feel the ponytail isn't suitable for my long long gown. ya lor, i saw the pony tail on Jeanette Aw's hair. Maybe he did her hair too, haha! thot could it be he's not very good with hair, hence suggested a pony tail? i tie one myself almost every day, keke!

 

[missyling]

hahaha actually pony tail is nice but must depends on gowns and occasion.. ur gown is so grand den with a pony tail.. like so out of place...

has he seem ur gown pic? if he had and can suggest that... mmm can strike him off alrdy.

 

[moonsafarian]

Cat > The groom gives the bride's family 2 bottles of wine/hard liquor & receives 2 bottles of orange juice in return? I dun think items during GDL are returned in odd numbers.

Regarding the PJ, my advice can only be give whatever amt yr HTB can afford. No point giving $9999, if he doesn't know how much gets returned. As for your in-laws' outfits, best to get yr HTB to persuade them bah. I'm sure they wanna look good on their son's wedding day too.

My FMIL bought a top and wanted to get trousers for the banquet. She doesn't usually wear skirts by the way. My HTB told her "NO!", keep the pantsuit for the day events if she wanna wear trousers. As for me, i dun mind what my family members will wear, coz they'll definitely wanna look good too. So long my mom & FMIL don't turn up in the same outfits, and they're comfy with what they wear, i'm happy hehehehe!

 

[missyling]

cat, there are certain stuffs we don't return to the groom but exchange for it. Like the wine, we gals side will return with 2 bottle of orange juice.

Some of the xi bings, cans troters. If ur mum got request for it then return some only. And if u got a pig pig, got to make sure you all return what is needed to be return.

I didn't asked my parent how much they will return on the pin jin.. as my dad mentioned they are marrying dotter, not selling. So it be a xin yi.. my granny even joke.. who know my dad will only take $1 ...

 

[missysee]

Cat> ur story is so close to my heart loh... No worries dear. What's over is over le... Let's see how to salvage the situation. Sometimes my mum also commented "NO ONE DO THINGS LIKE THAT.." I get very pissed off. Nowadays, I would jokingly tell her: "I first time get married mah.." (must sound funny else mums can be sensitive to our comments too).

For incident 2, err.. not sure if u read my very long time ago posting.. I had the same issue. Seeing most bride's mum's return AB tables, i also happily asked how much my mum gona to reurn... so that I can estimate total damages for HM.. she flared up and we went into arguments for almost 2 mths. I can't say it's really argument too, coz most of the time only she scold and I keep quiet. I was made the ungrateful daughter etc etc.. which really break my heart. Coz I felt i have done more than enough for the family w/o asking anything back.. and yet... haiz.. She always say "last time people.. last time people.." so I explained to her "last time people" marry daughter, the daughter no longer provide for the family, that's why take many $$. Now, I have never mentioned tt I will not provide for them anymore after marriage.. so I do not see the reason why they are so persistent on taking the ABs.. Until the day before GDL and we sorted out most feelings. They still taking all the ABs lah...

I just hope by sharing will make u feel better that u are not alone?

Moon.. I was just abt to say the same things as Ling.. heee.. Other than Fann Wong's wedding Jeannette Aw @ star awards, did u notice other 2 female artistes also the same pull back and tie a ponytail? One is Joanne Peh. The other I cannot remember the name. I would look like a bride on my wedding day.. wait people shake hand with my mum how? hmm...

 

[missysee]

Moon> re my earlier post, I meant i would still want to look like a bride on my wedding day... ponytail too simple yah? U so pretty le.. makeup should be no big issue, but hairstyle will make a difference! but these high profile MUA hor, u cannot give too much comments, wait they angry...

Ladies> side track a bit, I'm totally upset over work. So disturbed over it for months and cannot cope. Yet boss indifference to it. Almost cried in office this morning. Am all alone to face the war now... no one to confide to in office which made me feel even worse.. Alongside stressed over exams, invitations and seating arrangements too.. Just ignore me.. I'll be better after 7pm.. needed a place to shout HELP~

 

[joey_cat]

Ling: the problem is I don't know what to return, what not to return.. my mom do away with most stuffs, she herself also blur abt what is needed, what is not... always diff ans when I ask her the same question..

Missysee.. ya, I remember, intention is the same.. damage management... last night 2.5 hours, I also the one kena scolded none stop... and only after she cool down after 2 hrs of scolding, I reason with her, tell her why I ask certain thing, the intention behind them.. she then say "accepted my explaination" but still very sore about it...

If the parents keep saying "xin Yi" will do, why bother about whether the wine is from our collection or we purposely make a trip to supermarket buy a few dollar red wine as she requested??? does a few dollar red wine = more sincerity etc...

I don't know lah..... will just do as Moon and other suggested... just listen.. do as requested.... be REALLY HUMBLE....

Moon... my issue here is.. the son don't talk to the parents.. hence, the DIL i.e. ME have to sweet talk the parents.. where I already implicitly and EXPLICITLY ask them to wear suits and something nice... I can't imagine if later my ILs think that I look down on them, scared they make me look bad etc... actually I don't mind what they wear, as long as they feel happy and comfortable.. Like I told my guests, they can come in jeans if they wish, they can even come in swiming costume if they dare... at the end of the day, is the "xin Yi" that count, it is an hounour to have them to make a trip down to our wedding.... not what they wear.. For my JM, they can wear any colour they like, not even need to be coordinated, as long as NO BLACK as parents dont like..

the problem now is HTB and my Parents don't think this is appropriate. If I can't even convince myself, how on earth am I going to convince the 2 ILs... ??? sigh.............

 

[moonsafarian]

Ling > Yup, i went for the trial, equipped with photos of all my gowns and makeup/hair styles i like. Still he suggested a ponytail :/

I think he won't insist on the ponytail bah. I'm the client, i'll tell him off! Haha! U all think the makeup's up to par? I feel it's very different from the makeup done by the BS MUA, but whether much better or not...

Missysee > Sayang, sayang, quickly get home and rest. a good night's sleep does wonders

Cat > Gosh, i really don't know how to advise u. It's really tough on u to balance the wishes of both families. Haiz, sayang u too!

 

[joey_cat]

Missysee.. Sayang sayang too... pat pat.. We all(Amanda, you and me) all having bad bad bad day....

also fire fighting here, with 2 colleagues down and d*mm moody today... my desk is like a war zone. But think will settle few more item and go off... need to tidy my super messy rented flat to welcome my parents this Thursday... everything must be properly arranged (e.g. transport, meal, itineray, card writting tools, distribution arrangement in JB and SG... ).. else I will kena again.....

 

[missysee]

Moon, duno is it becoz of the lighting..I can't see much diff wor.. but I must agree it looks very natural with eye colours blended well and nice eyebrow! comparing to the BS MUA, his eyebrow looks more natural. err.. true opinion is i find $1.3k too exp for his service le.. it's so hard to guage what will be the diff btw his and BS MUS skills on AD. But they must be famous for a reason? hee... I noticed u dun like to smile with teeth shown hor?

Bye ladies, knock off early today.. buay tarhan work liao..

 

[moonsafarian]

Hehehehe! Missysee u are one observant girl! Ya lor, i seldom smile showing my teeth. Don't like my big & uneven teeth!

By the way, i looked for a few other MUAs for consideration, and decided to meet up with one on Thurs. He requested to see me in my gowns, so i've made arrangements to meet him at the BS. I have good faith in his work, as he was the MUA for one of my gal pals, and the hair was simply amazingly done.

Cross your fingers for me, babes!

 

[soul_slayer]

Amanda > oh gosh..I was having dinner while reading ur post and I feel so sad tt I think I teared a bit..*sniff*..sorry for getting emotional too..I am lousy at giving pple's advise...Pls think of urself first...It's ur own wedding...if ur brother really dun wanna attend so be it..I know it will be awkward and all but what u can do is really try to talk to ur brother and his gf too..chin up gal...

 

[soul_slayer]

Seems like we are all so high strung...just now my montage studio pissed me off...tomorrow I'm gg to take half day leave to fight the war...imagine I am the client and I have to 'di shen xia qi' to talk to him...like wtf man..tom I am really gg to scr*w him..hahaha..sorry for the language...but seriously...*pui*!

 

[missyling]

cat: mmm really don't know how to advise you cause different parents got different expectation.

Ladies.. weeks to go.. month to go. Bear in mind, once nearer.. there be more last min. pop up or issue.

Most important is our hb understand what is going on and not later point fingers @ each other. In the end, is we couple suffered.

 

[sotongada]

haiz..im also jialat yesterday...one of my hb's xiong di's granny passed away yesterday morning..then hb jumping high and low to find another one..cos we needed car...but lucky lor..managed to find one at midnite..hehe ^^

amanda, 1st of all, *pats pats* n calm down...to me, after reading ur post, i felt that ur bro and his gf are SO IMMATURE..what is birthday comparing to wedding...birthday is once a year but WEDDING IS ONCE IN A LIFETIME...moreover is own sister getting married, why cant brother help and u r not being told that ur parents are going, so why blame you....as for ur bro gf, her mama is big..so what abt ur bro's parent, arent they big to?? if she wana some respect, then she shd show ppl her respect 1st...tell ur bro that this kind of DA XIAO JIE not worthy for him to love...have to be fair to everyone lor..

soul, *pats pats* customer is always right de..if not up to ur standard, request until u feel comfortable abt it...

i totally agree with ling..as time approaching, more things will appear..that is why we need to get things done and spend this one month clearing all the 'GOODIES' at this hour...let's jiayou together!!!

CHEER UP LADIES...

 

[soul_slayer]

I was looking at ^moon^ FB photos just now on her wedding prep..wah liao ^moon^ > ur budget unlimited ah? Haha..u bought almost EVERYTHING!!! hahaha..but gd also cos I think I'm lacking in many areas...how u managed to find time to buy and shop and surf net while working? I'm almost dying already doing the bare min and trying to outsource everything to my JM..Lately even the XD outfit also outsource to 1 of our XD...so lazy man...haha!

Yayun > ya! haha..who knows I might end up doing the montage myself..*faints*..hahaha

 

[sotongada]

soul, haha DIY will surely up to ur comfy..hahahaha

 

[missyling]

soul... haha we r oso doing our own montage.. but till now.... nothing is done... -_-"

 

[amanda1982]

Yayun> I knew my parents going to give out invitation cards on sun but I didn't know they got my bro to drive them. I dun know wat more to say. I just feel very sad & hopeless.

Ladies> my mum is ok but she now having hard times talking to my bro. Is all my faults. My bro dun even wan talk to me at all.

 

[sotongada]

amanda, you cannot blame urself for this..what i can say is both ur bro and his gf are being childish by handling things like this...they only care abt themselves and not others.. i think now, only have to let them cool down then sit down and talk..no use to talk when anger is in mind...