(2005/09) ROM in Sept 2005

maruko

New Member
bear, travis still coughin this morning...tink tonite after work will bring him to c doc again...this time gotta go to his paedi liao...
 


queenie_30

New Member
Hey all!
I just got back fr bali.Got a volcanic hot stone massage for the very 1st time by 2 masseuse.It was fantastic!
Stones were not as hot as i thot it wld be.It was so relaxing.
 

anise

Member
queenie.. hmm din know got hot stone massage.. had not been for massage for quite some time already.. guess i will have mine in april when i go phuket.. looking forward to my trip.. is there any nice resort in phuket to recommend me..

jannie.. so how is travis? getting better?

sue.. envy u can plan and build up your love nest.. for me i still waiting.. =< i gave up my chance in boon keng DBSS.. guess i did my right choice.. not worth getting a 4 room flat at 560K and have to pay for all the stupid ERP in town
 

queenie_30

New Member
anise,
there r many beautiful resorts in phuket.Do u hv a budget &amp; wat is ur preferred location?
I stayed at dusit laguna.Far fr patong but beach is better &amp; away fr the crowd.
 

suetan

New Member
bear, thanks for the webby, must find chance to return u the mags.......kept forgetting. I got off work real late these few weeks. But ur post made me laugh real hard, I am so kuku, for awhile I dun understand the part abt mud n debris getting to unmentionable plcs.... I was tinking wat part, hahahha! Roughly hw much are the rugs ah?

anise, heard fr my fren 4 rm got no seaview, 3 rms n 5 rms got. She also gave up cos she dowan to stretch herself. Ur turn will come to do up ur hse
happy.gif
 

weixiongy

New Member
harlow peeps!!!!

wah da jie your massage sounds really shiok worrr. of course you cant expect them to really use fresh volcanic stones from the core......prob i'll see a stack of cooked ribs by the time they are done.....^^

jannie!!! hows little travis? all alright already?
did you manage to see his paedi, what was the suggestions given?

bear, what you gone thru reminds me of my army days haa haa haa.

sue, cant wait to see your house hehehehe sounds like its gonna be a masterpiece ^^ gosh every house i have been to are all so nice......kinda worried about mine haa haa haa
 

maruko

New Member
thx ppl for ur concern over travis...yesterday afternoon mil brought him to c another doc coz he been cryin whole morning den refuse to drink milk...doc says his nose blocked so he havin probs drinkin his milk...he seems much better this morning, able to play &amp; smile liao...yesterday wanna play wif him but he refused...
 

man_tou_bear

New Member
Gd morning..

Very funny hor.. me getting stuff stuck up my ass... :p was really quite gross cos i got stuck in the mud, sank up to my calves. gross gross gross...

Sue, ya when u free then return me. I got frens asking for the mags too.
happy.gif
i got one big shaggy rug at $180 and a smaller rug at $60 i think. quite reasonable.
happy.gif


Anise, if it is ur first time at Phuket, then i recommend u stay in Patong. It is the 'town' of Phuket. I stayed at this boutique hotel called Burasari. Only 30m from the beach.. wonderful!

Jannie, thank goodness he is better.. Hang in there ya?
 

maruko

New Member
bear, no worries...juz abit fed up dat mil keep emphasizin yesterday dat i was the 1 who pass the virus to him n hb... -_- me oredi felt bad passin to travis liao n she is addin fuel to it...oh well...wat can i say???
 

anise

Member
jannie... dun care wat ur mil mentioned. anyway u noe she will sure use this chance to add oil.. most importantly make sure travis get well real soon..

bear.. how come got stuck in mud.. gross wor.. can't imagine.. hmm ya this is the first time i going phuket.. i heard about burasari.. will chk it out =)
 

man_tou_bear

New Member
Oh no Jannie... sigh.. as if she say u are to blame would help the situation!!! quite annoying.. are u at home or at work? i kinda pity u leh.. sick and stay at home also cannot.. U prob be worse listening to her nag and blaming u. Kids get sick sooner or later one. that's why they are KIDS!!

Anise, i had to go and deploy traps. they have to be positioned in a particular way so means we have to be in the water... yucks... i dread retrieving them cos we cannot lose the things in the trap. Means prob have to bring snorkelling gear and duck our head underwater.. DOUBLE YUCKS!
 

maruko

New Member
bear, guess she assumes dat travis will stay healthy thru out his childhood lor...wont get fever or watever...anyway me cant b bothered la...when she keep emphasizin me juz "mmm ya ya...he still young so immunity still low now" as if i can dun take care of him when im sick...my hb cant handle him alone also...if can i dun wanna b near him at all when im sick lor...
 

weixiongy

New Member
i think this was posted before and i happen to chance upon it again so here it is again

DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question.

She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?"

I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said,
"It depends. Is that your husband?"

In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are
good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.

EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with
your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a
completely natural and spontaneous experience.
You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...

Because it's happening TO YOU.


People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the
imagery of that _expression. It implies that you were just standing
there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling is love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.

But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the
natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls
become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when
it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you
think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between
the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry
the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of
the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with
someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their
spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is
the most obvious. But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby, a
friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage.

It lies within it.

I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a
few years later. Because (listen carefully to this):


THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE
RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER
just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it
day in and day out. That's why we have the _expression "the labor of love."

Because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it
takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific
things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there
are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise
program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your
relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and
effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...you can "make" love.

Love in marriage is indeed a "decision"... Not just a feeling.
 

weixiongy

New Member
hehehehe
bear i think i will enjoy doing that LOL. need someone to do the dirty job for you??? price can be negotiable hehehehe

jannie, be strong now and you will sure emerge as a great mother hehehehe coz we can say words of sarcasm, hurt, denial...anything but we cannot deny the feeling deep down inside hehehe sooner of later it will catch up on your mil and she will regret ever saying all those accusations.
in fact kids falling sick are good coz from young train up their antibodies to be strong i mean that is how we evolve mah. to accustom to the changes mah.
 

queenie_30

New Member
anise,
i agree with bear,for ur 1st time to phuket,stay in patong.If u stay further,u'll need trasportation.But it can be too crowded.

jannie,
whenever there's a kid,everyone has an opinion on how to care or bring it up esp grandparents.Since u need her help,there's not much u can say.U may need to find an alternative bfe she drives u up to the wall.

wx,
of caz not the real thing lah but perhaps the stones r fr the volcanoes.It was hot but in a shiok sort of way.
 

maruko

New Member
dajie, me realised nowadays when travis cries she will com to me n carry him away...sigh...me onli got nite time to bond wif him liao but she still takes him away from me at times like i cant handle him like dat...if this goes on tink travis will onli wan her when he starts to throw tantrum...
 

weixiongy

New Member
jannie, is your mil suffering from any illness or old age problems???? seems like she is afraid of something......which i cant really say what it was.....but i got that gut feel hehehehe
 

weixiongy

New Member
hehehe da jie what you say made me think about the opinion and the ass thing haa haa haa
but true lah everyone got their own share of advise ^^

jannie i hope that your mil is certainly not spoiling him this way.....everytime got problem run to granny and no one can touch him.
 

man_tou_bear

New Member
Jannie, wat to do? u are dependent on her. if want ppl to help need to listen to them. May be u can tell her tactfully that she take care the whole day tired, and that u wanna learn how to pacify Travis, so dun take him away... sigh.. u can always complain to us.

WX, u can take leave or not? i usually do it in the morn! :p damn gross lor..
 

maruko

New Member
wx, illness??? dun tink so la except for those normal types like high cholesterol, high blood pressure n body aches lor...tink travis oredi noes dat she is spoilin him liao...coz once in her arms travis will stop cryin...knowin dat he is "safe" in her arms...

bear, she noes i can pacify travis but she juz wanna take over when he started to cry lor...tink in a way she more heart pain den me when he cries lor...so wanna pacify him herself...dats wat i tink lah...
 

anise

Member
jannie... i tink u should openly tok to her.. at least lt her know wat u tinking... if u always give in to her, eventually u will be the only one suffering.. dun forget, travis is your baby not hers.. sound her out.. ask ur hubby to support u..

queenie and bear.. ya i m tinking of staying at potong since i never been to phuket before.. now searchin for resort.. looking at burasari, the one bear intro
 

man_tou_bear

New Member
Anise, Burasari is very gd! haha... i liked it and it was the most ex room i ever paid for. :p i took the pool access room which means i can just enter the pool via my deck.
happy.gif


Tea, busy ah... take care okie?

Jannie, sigh. u know i dun think she heart pain when travis cries is the only reason. I do feel that she wants to show u that she can pacify Travis better than u, one way or another.
 

maruko

New Member
bear, mayb she wanna let travis stick to her more???

anise, no doubt travis is my son but he is her 1st grand son leh...dun tink i can speak openly to her...she is those type dat keeps to herself den mayb talk behind me type...so i rather i dun tell her much in case she say more things abt me behind my back...
 

man_tou_bear

New Member
Nobody interested to post liao... hahhaa.. all have we outgrown this?

Jannie, it is possible.. some MILs will die die wanna keep taking care of their grandkids then complain that their kids chuck their bbs to them.. :p not easy lah but we are here to listen.
 

suetan

New Member
Hi all,

been really busy, shuttling between work, home, my new plc. My granny came to stay with us cos my uncle n family is going away to visit my cousin in Melbourne for a mth.
 

suetan

New Member
agree with bear. Mils wanna hog onto their grandkids then later complain when the grandkids are left in their care n they lose their wkends n freedom etc
 

maruko

New Member
bear n sue, tink mils wan their grandchild 2 b more attached to them...my sis got the same prob...dat day while me talkin to her casually, she told me her hb went on biz trip so her 3yr old daughter went to her room to sleep wif her for the night...normally her daughter sleeps wif her mil...who noes next day she heard her mil askin her daughter "how com u no sleep wif ah ma oredi? u dun wan ah ma liao ah?" -_- my sis wanna faint lor...den after dat she realised her daughter dun wanna sleep wif her liao...abit scary rite?
 

anise

Member
happie holiday everyone...

been busy.. sorry that din come in an post..

jannie.. so ur sis oso got this problem.. she must be real upset since her daughter dun wanna slp with her now.. gosh!!i guess most mils are the same.. that juz wan their grandchild to be close to them since now their son already pre-occuppied by wife..

maybe by not staying with il won't cross all these problems..
 

maruko

New Member
anise, i believe if given a choice most couples wont wanna stay wif ils...but circumstances dun allow at times n like me, we r forced to accept the fact...

hav been to view a couple of flats, none catches my mil's "eyes" so gotta keep lookin...sigh...dunno how many more we gotta view...feel so tired physically n mentally liao...
 

cherz

New Member
Hi guys,
been busy with financial yr end and also fitting of gowns.

jannie,
so yr mil decides to stay with u? Dun give up. if u buy a place yr mil doesnt like, she sure gonna grumble for the rest of her stay there.

my hb works on wkends so i dun visit my parents and in-laws on a regular basis like most couples do.

sue,
hows yr reno??
 

maruko

New Member
cherz, me still dunno for sure if she will b stayin wif us or not but tink most likely lah...coz will need her to help take care of travis mah...now keepin fingers crossed dat she will b able to view 1 dat she like...BUT my mum say y muz we get a flat dat she like since we r the 1 payin 4 the flat n she is juz the occupant...well, she will b the one "takin care" of the flat so better to look 4 1 dat she likes lor...if not later me even more headache...sigh...

dajie, wow...big posh hotel sia...me will luv to swap places wif u :p
 

kyra

New Member
I come in once in a while still but really lost track of the happenings, except that many of you are now dog owners! Haha!

At my end, after ROM in Sept 2005, life went back to normalcy. We finished the flat reno in Q1 2007. Customary over by Sept 07 and we shifted in officially after that. Dogs have finally settled down after 2 months or so. The honeymoon is FINALLY taking place soon - 2 weeks USA in April 08. And nope, we have no plans for kid(s)...yet.

And...if some of you may recalled, I had problems with my bossy SIL. Before CNY, we showed hands liao *shake head* She was talking behind my back and calling me names. I shot her an email to shut her up, only short of calling her a B.I.T.C.H.

Life is so difficult at times
sad.gif
 

suetan

New Member
cherz, my reno is sort of coming to the last stage. Very busy, OT till 730pm.....very tired...

jannie, I agree with ur mum y find a plc tat she likes, she is jus a occupant, she is not paying rite. Jus let her do watever she wants with her rm but the hse is urs. She remarry issit? Y arent they staying together?
 

maruko

New Member
welcom back kyra, its been a long time since we heard frm u...glad to c ur post...me agree life is so diffcult at times...at least urs is juz a bossy SIL which u can shut her up...i cant do dat to my MIL...will look bad on me...sigh...

sue, yup my mil remarry...not stayin together coz he is not a singaporean, drivin a cab in m'sia n is onli here on wkends but now he coms over until wed so dat he can help my mil take care of travis...so me n hb pay him a sum mthly to cover his loss of income for the days he is here...

frankly speakin, hb talked to her juz now abt the issues of lookin for a flat n she got mad at him for sayin she got high expectations den even said she dun wanna stay wif us liao...sigh...see??? i predict even more probs comin me n hb's way...she is a christian n i do hope God can help us now even though we r not...
 

kyra

New Member
I'm threading on very thin line now. The in-laws have been kind and fair (so far) but that is their "precious" daughter. Should the matter be blown up, I doubt they will side with DIL, even if I am not in the wrong. Sometimes I regretted marrying such a mummy's boy (who happens to be the sister's pet).
 

queenie_30

New Member
jannie,
i'm back fr the dusty city &amp; the htl is probably the only posh plc there.Swap places &amp; run away fr reality for abit but in life we muz face reality.
Just rem,dont over compromise.It's ur life too!U gotta knw when to make a stand &amp; when to stand back.

kyra,
nice to see u here.
Dont we all wish we married an orphan sometimes.
 

suetan

New Member
jannie, she is not going to give u a good time anyway, so either u all get a plc she likes or nt, she is going to show her "power". Then just discuss with ur hb and get a plc u all like, she doesnt wan to stay with u all then tell her u all cant force her. There is only so much u all can give in. Let ur hb do the talking.

kyra,sometimes I will ask myself y I marry a man with such a family.....But wat to do, I ald thank god I din stay with them. Nt that they are bad ppl, jus tat we have diff values n habits.
 

man_tou_bear

New Member
Hi guys! I am having the runs! Imagine still on the throne in sch also kena mozzie bites!! urgh!

Kyra, hrmm ya u are really threading on thin ice here. how did u find out that she was bitching behind ur back? aft the email, wat did she react? it is a gd thing u aren't staying with them. Ur hb is a mommy's boy ah? he really won't side u at all???

Jannie, so messy.. nothing to say but hang in there ok?
 

kyra

New Member
Dajie - I just came back from Indonesia 2 weeks ago. Was in Jakarta, Bandung, Semarang, Surakarta and Surabaya for work for a total of 16 days. Going back to the hotels at the end of the days had always been a comforting thought. Haha! It was my first trip to Indon (except for Batam &amp; Tg Pinang).

Yes, I sometimes wish I had married an orphan. Or someone estrangled from his family =X

Jannie - Your MIL is shifting into YOUR house leh, not vice versa. You should make the call. But I understand sometimes circumstances just dont allow it. But come to in-laws, the hb should really do the talking.

suelynn - I also thank god EVERYDAY that I am not staying with them. But we are staying very near to both sides parents. In-laws will ask us to go back for dinner 1-2 times per week
sad.gif
And my SIL is around everytime.

I told my mum about it. She said the same thing, that we have different values and habits. I may see their family as weird, they could be thinking we are weird too
sad.gif


Bear - During the cold war, I checked my hb's handphone (haha, ok, this part I was wrong). Found out that his sis asked him one day if we were going bk for dinner, will ask MIL to cook. So he replied that we fought and I had been going out to dine with my friends. And also added that he didnt want to go back to parents' house, very sian etc etc.

And the sister then wrote things like (in diff sms) - dont bother about her, she is crazy. you treat her too well that's why she is like that. she is always treating her friends better than our family. you dont go and fetch her, you are always ferrying her around. she is unreasonable and cannot take stress thus throw tantrum on you. you spend so much money on her yet she like that? how can leave you alone to eat, you make sure you eat something, your health not good, we will heartpain etc etc

B.I.T.C.H or not?

I shot her the email and cc my husband. She didnt reply at all. My hb blew up at me so we had a big fight. But in the end he apologised and said he will try not to speak to the sister much. I was most disheartened by the fact that he just let her rattle off and try to sow discord.

He said he never agreed with anything she wrote. He only said Sian then she wrote that. But my point is - why cant he stand up for me?
sad.gif


My husband is a mummy's boy, very used to letting the parents (or sister) decide everything for him. Thus when it came to our ROM, flat, reno, wedding etc...the sister had to say something everytime. His parents are nice to me and they indulge in him, so relationsp is cordial. Few hiccups during wedding preps, I told him to settle with his folks. But this sister bitching behind me, he never tell her off. So now i am wondering, did she bitch about me to the parents/relatives?
 

aeris

New Member
helo
happy.gif
so long nv post...

Saw maruko's post on her sis. Well, her MIL said tat to e grandchild might not hav meant harm or REALLY mean it to 'take' e kid away from e mum. Sometimes we do say tat kind of stuff. But maybe to e kid, they dun see it tat way. It's a gd thing tat e kid appreciates who takes care of her daily. It's a common 'regret' for working mums to be losing out in witnessing the growing up of the child. And to build up e bond b/w the mother n child. How to compare when u onli see the child after work n b4 her bedtime? Whereas she sees her ah ma e whole day. We cnt deny the bonding they share n quality time they spent together.

Abt e flat thing. Maybe u wanna talk to her what she dun like abt e flat u like? Maybe she din see e 'good points' of e flat? OR maybe she seen some flaws which u dun. IF it's plainly "I just dun like it." then I tink she's being difficult lah.

Sue, I so envy, dunno when then my flat cn reach e reno stage
sad.gif
My neck long like giraffe le...

Kyra, instead of quarreling, why dun u talk to ur hubby? Tell him wat u r unhappy abt. He might tink u r upset over wat his sis said. But in actual fact, u r more disturbed by e fact tat he din speak up for u n wat he tinks is right abt u. Communication plays a vital role in any r/s. I still tink face to face communication is e best. Try talking to his sis n make her change her views abt u? It takes a lot of time n effort, but since when handle interpersonal r/s is easy? Good luck
happy.gif
 


maruko

New Member
aeris, tink for my sis case...the mil wanna hav more bond wif the child coz she is quite attached to my sis most of the time nowadays...
as for my flat issue, my mil is very particular abt the unit location plus their conditions...normally we will talk after seein the flats den she will tell me how she tinks abt the flat lor...most of the time is loads of complaints lah...so me also see until sianz liao...btw its not ez to communicate wif her coz if u say "something" she dun like to hear den its gonna b "tough life" for me n hb...

kyra, my hb cant communicate wif my mil one...coz he is bad wif his words n she will always interpret in the "wrong" way...sigh...
ur SIL also one case leh...how can she sow discord btwn the 2 of u??? even though i dun like my bil i also dun talk bad abt him wif my sis...onli "gossip" wif my mum...hehehe...but not to the extent of sayin things like wat ur SIL said...tink i will do the same thing if im u but im lucky dat my hb will side wif me if i "clash" wif my mil...

sue, actualli so far the flats dat we c not very satisfactory also...dunno wat the agents doing...oredi told them our requirements liao but everytime when we go view sure not within our reqs one...sigh...

dajie, ya am sure we all wished we married orphans...den wont hav so many issues wif mil or sil...
 

Top