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It's usually given by the groom ba... For my case, I don't have to give all the misc. / traditional stuff (incl. pin jin, guo da li etc.)... but I have to give more tables to my WTB's family, and the bride gets to keep the red packets. It really depends on families' traditions / cultures... :)...

I think $10k is ok ba.. when my sis got married, my Mum also took $10k from my BIL. but she subsequently gave them back some $$ for the renovation of their place...