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  1. buddhabar

    Need advice on splitting wedding costs with my partner

    Wedding is a couple event , unless you marry up ( significantly ) else both of you should share and bear the full cost together. This includes the entire event from wedding preparation, gown, suits, photoshoot, dinner banquet etc All the angbaos , except those from the 6 tables for your mom's...
  2. buddhabar

    Thoughts please?

    TS, the context here seems to be about overseas student exchange program since the mentioned are in the early 20s with parents visiting them . Correct me if i am wrong. So how do you feel looking thru his chat history ? déjà vu ? was that how you two started too? obviously he is flirting behind...
  3. buddhabar

    I cheated and regretted it

    i don't understand how your wife could be so affirmative on the divorce given it was only "evening walks" or did she found out you committed adultery which is not mentioned in your post. i do feel for you on the aftermath especially being ostracized by your very own family. but...
  4. buddhabar

    A confession of a married man

    It's clear to see your role as a provider for the family has diminished over time now that the children are grown up and your wife no longer needs you or rather will NOT be helpless without you. You were nothing more than a material ,financial pillar in your family and unfortunately you didn't...
  5. buddhabar

    Need advice urgently

    what advice are you seeking? it's right down to yourselves. if you can truly forgive and forget, you should do so and there will be a great chance you 2 can be happy ever after with a beautiful family. Set it right affirmatively and move on whole heartedly ( and nothing less). For this chosen...
  6. buddhabar

    All because of my Insecurity

    Err... what do you mean by you went " overboard " ? you texted him nasty things or texting non stop relentlessly ? The formal is subjective, but the latter is certainly an obsessive behavior disorder. if it's a medical condition, please seek treatment. No normal person will be able to live...
  7. buddhabar

    Husband visited sex worker

    Holding on for kids sake is being naïve. because kids aint dumb like we were as kids. they know when daddy and mommy aint talking not to mention fighting. i believe kids are better off with a single parent then 2 fighting parents. it's too toxic for them, if you even care about them.
  8. buddhabar

    [Seeking Advice]: Ex keeps disrupting my life

    Why cant people just wait till the dust have settle before starting another relationship. is that so difficult. Having a relationship during separation is just asking for trouble IMO. This will only trigger more resentment, jealousy and hatred which will in turns make divorce more messy then it...
  9. buddhabar

    Husband visited sex worker

    If he truly repent, then it's a matter of forget and forgive on your part, assuming it's within your nature and character. if it's going to be at the back of your head and will spring up readily during arguments and fights as pent up grievances ... then you should think very hard. Can you truly...
  10. buddhabar

    I like an attached guy

    Its about time you come to terms you are merely his sex tool. What they call a FB, friend with benefit .
  11. buddhabar

    Rather be single and happy, than attached but irritated.

    Was reading an article and decided to share. Do most have the same concurrence ? SINGAPORE: Every decade, the unveiling of the latest Singapore Population Census data holds some delicious morsels of information of who we are as a nation. The latest 2020 iteration surveyed 150,000 households...
  12. buddhabar

    staying in a happy marriage

    Thank you for the contribution, a truly needed breathe of positivity in a mostly darkened vibes forum. It almost sounds like a extract of a counselling textbook. Perfectly articulated . In many real lives, mutuality has always been the biggest hurdle. :);)
  13. buddhabar

    Can I still salvage my marriage?

    sorry to hear that, so your kid custody is with your wife? Fret no more my friend. everything happen for a reason. i wish you best in your second half of your life.
  14. buddhabar

    Is it considered cheating?

    This is really subjective, what was the mutual agreement and understanding during the "break". - cooling off period where a couple remains in a committed relationship but cooling off to sort out their thoughts and their future respectively. - cooling off period where a couple can open their...
  15. buddhabar

    Is there such thing as a happy marriage?

    Acceptance is pre requisite before honesty. You need to have a partner who has acceptance before they can deal with your honesty. ie, if my spouse cant accept that i have bad habit of smoking and kick up a 3 days fight each time it happened, how will i handle it? i will choose not be honest...
  16. buddhabar

    Is there such thing as a happy marriage?

    Acceptance is the key to happiness as it's a fact there will no happiness without acceptance
  17. buddhabar

    How do you know if boyfriend/husband truly loves you?

    Not sure what's your context here, but marriage is lifetime journey and not a milestone to clear like what you mentioned, a life progression. It's important to understand marriage is not a conclusion to a relationship. Infact, it's the beginning of 50 -60 years of commitment. It requires hell...
  18. buddhabar

    Dying Inside and Lost

    "i keep thinking bt divorce, she too thinks about it" if this is mutual, you two should sit down and face each other and your marriage truthfully. Being responsible to your marriage is one thing, Taking responsibility for your life is another
  19. buddhabar

    Have you ever wished your spouse dead?

    i totally understand you predicament. My spouse is abusive and quarrelsome. Not sure if yours has a medical condition like mine. Bipolar is a great excuse. "it wasn't me, it was bipolar" i been taking that for 18 yrs. my teenagers children are not spare, especially my son. he gets slap, punch...
  20. buddhabar

    Cutting ties with children from previous marriage?

    TS, as a divorcee , you should know better children and bloodline are perpetual . spouse aint unfortunately , they are conditional .

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