Tips For Great Marriage

Hmmm .... I was wondering if I should be posting this since I have been having last 2 years of marriage issue. Anyways, I am now married for 32 yrs of which 28 yrs were great.

Here are my tips ....

1. Communicate (verbal or notes) everyday. Share what each encountered for the day. Any new ideas to share with each other?

2. Financially are you both ready? House, car, holidays and children ?

3. Comfortable with above then plan for marriage.
** Dated 5 yrs. We were married at 23 yos, I have bought an apartment and car then. **

4. After wedding, make each other the no. 1 human interaction ... not parents.

5. At age 45, financially freed .... no loans, children both overseas graduates and living on their own.

6. Travelling was our main priority. Been to Asean, Australia, Japan, China, Italy & USA (Hawaii, LA, Orlando & NYC).

That's all.
 


Detailed explanation ......

1. Communication
Becos we both work ... we only see each other after work. We update (and solicit suggestions) each other on issues at work and interesting happenings we observed on that day. We will have 2 nights/week where we go for dinner together .... dating feel. The rest of week we have dinner in in-law's house.
At home, we catch up with latest sitcoms together over a mug of Nescafe. Chat with each other intimately ... so know each other's wants and needs.

2. Finances
We have a joint account and personal accounts. Personal accounts where our salaries get credited in. Joint account where our savings go into. Every month we transfer from our personal to joint account. The amount based on what we want .... house, car, children, retirement. First 3 years of my married life, I was still driving my 2nd hand Nissan I bought when I started working. Wife was accountant, she in charge of joint account and directed amount from our personal accounts into joint account.

3. Wedding Expenses
We had church wedding - 150 guests. No Chinese banquet do. I think I spent around $3000 only. Got a few gifts from friends.
Simple photography in studio, only 3 shots - got a wedding photo (1 ft x 1.5 ft) hanging in a corner of our bedroom. Spent $800 then. Most photos were taken by friend who was a photography enthusiast. I gave him a $200 ang-pow.

4. Children
Had 2 children. Studied locally until high school then university in Australia & UK. Took children with us overseas since they were 5 yrs old. By 12 yrs old they have been to Disneyworld, Orlando. Spoke to them regularly .... told them their current inheritance is education. We will pay for their education to whatever level they can get into ... both are Masters graduates. Working in top international MNCs.

Visiting new locality is my motivation now.

Cheers.
 
Agreed that communication is the key.

My advice for married couples with children, is to put their partner above their children.
Happy couples lead to happy kids. :)

Never neglect the importance of showing care to your partner.
 

Rester

New Member
Hi bro,

Thanks for the shairng. Agree that communication and finance communication are very very important. Dont mind if i ask as i got curious. 28 out of 32 years were great. what about the other 3 years.

sorry if the question is too intrusive.
 

PhyllisHong

New Member
What we learnt in one of the marriage courses was the only person that should make the change is ourself, the change we make in ourself will be felt and induce a change in our partners. It really helped us grow a lot in our relationship.
 

Top